There are some interesting things that blogging has brought about for me and, for the most part, I’m pretty happy with them. I’ve met some bloggers and gotten a chance to get some honest, thought-worthy feedback on issues I struggle with and sometimes there are comments that are so hilarious they make my post look like a low-fat saltine cracker with all the salt licked off: generally unappealing.
When that last one happens, I’m still fairly amused and end up giggling my way through comments and I am grateful for all the witty, intelligent people with a sense of humor who come to visit this site.
Other times? Mmm. Not so much.
Normally, I probably wouldn’t give much credence to a nasty commentor, but I’m not of the camp of If You Respond, Then They Win. I’m of the camp of I’m Fairly Certain This Is MY Blog And I’ll Do What I Damn Well Please. The fact that I’m going to devote today’s entry to it is IN NO WAY an invitation for anyone to feel that they need to come to my defense.
I’m perfectly capable of that on my own.
To wit: my aunt tells a story of when she visited our home when I was about 9 or 10 years old and we were in the backyard together. Some kid walked near our property and hurled racial slurs toward me and I took him on. My aunt gasped at the thought of what would come of it but watched me verbally rip him to shreds. When she relayed the story to my mother later on she said, “And do you know what your daughter did? She gutted him.”
Let it be said that sometimes I practice Wu Wei and sometimes I don’t. This brings me to the comment in question (but really, is it a question? mmm. not so much.)
Yup, hate just about sums it up. You are pompous, self-centered, self-important, and have some crazy belief that we give a rat’s ass about your greedy, capitalistic, in-your-face, show-offy nature. Are we supposed feel bad that you get to attend the game and we don’t? Do expect us to care that your blog was being reposted by bitacle.org? Please, spare us your theatrics.
This person has obviously read me long enough to know I’m capitalistic, so that makes me feel like my writing has really improved and that the themes are being captured in my expressive style. So that’s good! Maybe my writing professor from college would be interested in my url so I’m making a note to send her an e-mail right now!
The theoretical perspective needed to make a critique about writing is a lost art. Apparently, it’s also still lost on her because she didn’t address some of those critical issues since she just attacked me personally.
In spite of that, it warms my heart to know that she captures my essence in her precis (I feel the need to define that word for HER because she didn’t proofread her comment when she wrote that “Do expect us to care…” bit and I couldn’t tell if it was from being obtuse or just too quick on her typing skills, so here goes: a summary or abstract of a piece of text or speech. Was that helpful? Good. I like to be helpful as well as self-important.) In her precis she says that I’m “theatrical”. Honestly, she couldn’t be more right about that. It’s my love of the theatre that has allowed me to be such a self-centered person all these years! To put myself through college as a single parent and do things like faint in the welfare office and use my best seductive voice with “All right, Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my food stamps.” Now, THAT’S theatre!
Perhaps I could point out some times when I am a little more self-deprecating. For example:
- When I made fun of my zits and the black hairs that mysteriously grow out of my chin. I mean, how unattractive! Eeewww.
- When I made fun of myself for having a broken laptop, once again dealing with the fact that my daughter’s biological father (henceforth known as Richard Cranium) HASN’T PAID ME A DIME and reneged on his responsibility to pay for college, and how I’m now wearing a retainer even after spending six years in braces.
- When I showed mercy on a kid who threw a bottle at my moving car and vowed to do more than punish him. (Follow up to that: he transferred schools and I haven’t had a chance to make a connection with him.)
- When I spent an entire week devoting my site to shedding light on some books that have been banned because I believe that no one has the right to think for me.
The way that WordPress works is they catch spam for me so if a person is commenting for the first time, doesn’t leave a blog address, or adds too many links then it goes to my Spam filter and I don’t bother to look through them because I just delete them all. It just so happens that I caught this commentor because there were fewer than 20 spam comments.
So, was it coincidence my comment disappeared? Or do you practice censorship?
Oh, wait! There IS a question! Two of them! Well, now I feel like I should answer those.
No, it wasn’t coincidence. It was simply good taste on the part of WordPress and thus, I had the option to APPROVE the comment. While I de-spammed the comments she left I, in no way, approve of the comment. Nor do I approve of censorship. If I did, then I probably wouldn’t have bought that Banned Books bracelet. (I’m trying not to be too show-offy here, but it was $20 of my high-end teacher salary.)
What I do approve of is speaking my piece and deleting the comment soon. Another thing I will be doing is striking through the very words I’ve box-highlighted right after I eradicate my comment section of those unimaginative, imbecilic and hateful words.
As luck would have it, I was conversing with the inimitable LeahPeah last night when she offered this riotous pearl of wisdom about comment trolls:
nasty commentors have a special place in hell. where they have to sit in eternity reading the blog that they hate and yet feel compelled to troll and haunt (because they are jealous!!). and the submit button is broken so they can never be heard from again.
Nevertheless, until I delete that annoying comment I will be encouraging regular readers to respond in such a way as not to engage themselves too much in this absurdity, but rather in the humorous, uplifting ways they normally do. Unless, of course, the Wu Wei strikes you in an entirely different manner.
With that said, I trust that my readers are intelligent enough to decide for themselves because THEY HAVE THEIR OWN BRAINS and I love that about them.
Wu Wei at will, people.
October 26, 2006 @ 10:28 pm | Filed under Lessons I'm Learning | Permalink |
kari Said,
October 26, 2006 @ 11:59 pm
i am ashamed to say that i had no idea what ‘precis’ meant, so thank you for defining it (even though i know it was for the benefit of someone with an even smaller brain than my own… oh, shoot, i’m not supposed to be talking about that stuff, huh?).
i love your sassy, capitalistic, self-important, theatrical, and self-centered… um… self. (sassy was my own addition to the list - you like?) you’re my hero of the moment.
p.s. this is twice in one day i’ve been the first commenter on someone’s blog! woot!
Belinda Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 12:51 am
Whoooo-WEEEE! Heh. Sorry. I kind of loved it when “Linda” was being totally IGNORED, but that’s just me. And I am FASCINATED by people who profess to just despise the writers of the VERY BLOGS THEY ARE READING. Seriously. Do you have THAT much time on your hands? I don’t. Man, if I come across a blog *I* hate, I just don’t read it! What’s so hard about that?
Anyway, can I point out that, with your multiple use of the word “theatre,” we must face the possibility that you’ve been spending too much time with the Canadians?
Belinda Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 12:51 am
I’m also fascinated to see how long you can keep up this “You Should Be…” theme going in your titles. Challenge on, girlfriend.
ali Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 3:28 am
i haven’t seen much by way of nasty comments on my own blog but it is small, good for you for saying something! it is your blog and if they don’t like it they don’t have to read it!
RW Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 3:53 am
I see nothing wrong in deleting comments that have no business seeing the light of day over at my blog. It is not a matter of freedom of speech, to my way of thinking. It is a matter of behaving while someone is in my house in the midst of my guests. If someone is being offensive they are either chided or removed. I don’t believe in the idea that comments of any nature deserve to remain posted just because they’re there. I don’t feel the compunction to act as some jerk’s vehicle for his or her vitriol. If I don’t like it - it’s gone. My blog is not a democracy. When someone says “that’s censorship!” my response is simple; “That’s right. I’m an awful person who deserves to be dismissed. So go away and don’t come back.”
wifey615 Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 5:15 am
rock on!
-S. Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 6:21 am
First I want to thank you again for expanding my vocabulary. Really!
Second, if this person hates you so much and can’t stand your blog, why do they keep reading it? They must feel so bad about their life that all they can do is be miserable and make others miserable as well.
I think you have a GREAT thing here and I look forward to reading it every day!
-S.
Elizabeth Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 6:27 am
I do not understand people who feel the need to insult someone in a post comment. Like ooooh, that really hurts my feelings when you TYPE something insulting for me to read. As for self-importance, what is wrong with that? Shouldn’t we have love for ourselves and good self-esteem, and by that token also feel self-important?
The definition of self-centered is “engrossed in onself and one’s affairs”. When you write a blog, about yourself and your life, you are being self-centered. It’s not a bad thing. Perhaps your commenter would prefer to read posts in which you put yourself down and write about how unworthy you are?
First Jennster, now you. Can’t we all just be left alone to blog in peace?
Dave2 Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:00 am
As I said in my email, I just don’t get why people continue to read a blogger that they obviously dislike. That’s not your problem, it’s theirs. If somebody disagrees with me, I have no problem approving their comment, but senseless name-calling doesn’t contribute anything to the conversation and is usually deleted.
Tanilan Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:00 am
And that is why I love you so much!
I think it is outright stupidity to bash someone on their own blog and expect them to take it. That’s just dumb. You have every right to do and say what you want on your blog and if they don’t like it…as so many of us have stated already…don’t read it.
I watched about 5 minutes of the game last night and thought of you. I hope you had an excellent time.
chris Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:17 am
I love you
Brenda Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:28 am
All I know is that if we were playing kickball on the playground, I’d want to be on your team. I hope the troll enjoyed her tongue lashing.
Caffeinated Librarian Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:40 am
You know, I’m often very glad that I find out about these things after the fact. It’s like when Cara was getting trolls from her “raw milk” posts. The instinct is to launch into “Defend the Friend” mode, which is usually nasty and involves something along the lines of “Back off beeeaaaootch!” Just as Cara did in her situation, you handled it so much better and with more class than I would have.
You mean people actually write about themselves on their own blogs?????!!!!! *shock* *dismay* *horror* *righteous indignation* Well, we need to change THAT. After all, they need to be writing about me.
And on a totally unrelated note: You mean that bracelet is only $20? How did I miss that?! Heck, window or no window…even I can afford THAT. Boy, don’t I feel unobservant.
So, tell us about the game! Did you get to go last night?
Sarah Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:45 am
You tell ‘em!
If someone doesn’t like you then what are they doing here? I, personally, enjoy your blogs very much, thank you.
dfinley Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 8:09 am
we love you…however the weather not so much. Maybe you should just give me your world series ticket. I think the rain is sending that message. At least that is how I read it…Enjoy..Go CARDS!!!!!!!!
Haters…they suck.
Mocha Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 8:14 am
Just a brief update on my “Game Situation”
I didn’t go to last night’s game. Our tickets on Wednesday are now good for tonight’s game which means…. (*drumroll*)… that if they win tonight’s game we will watch them WIN THE WORLD SERIES.
Can you say “parrrr-taayyyy”?
Yes, you can.
So… look for me tonight. I’ll have a sign, I just don’t know yet what it will read.
Jenna Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 8:30 am
Holy Sh*t! remind me never, ever to get on your bad side. unless of course i already am, and then you can watch me curl into the fetal postion rock, and cry…i’m sorry!
And thanks for the vocab lesson! what a great start to my continuting ed day…well that, and sleeping until 10:30..love it!
Peace!
Nora Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 9:49 am
The phrase, “Miss a day, Miss a lot” comes to mind. Miss two days and well.. you are all behind like me. (All behind is an accurate physical description of me as well, but I digress.) Since I haven’t had time to email you again, I just wanted to let you know, I am not freaking out so much. I am only a little freaky now. ; )
Jennifer Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 9:54 am
I love coming to this blog! and basking in your(LOL) self centeredness…….I simply LOVE it!
Keep’em coming Kelly!
Jennnifer
jennster Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 10:27 am
i totally think you can do waht you want, say what you want, address what you want- and just know that you can’t please everyone all the time. and when you’re popular, people won’t like you. fuck em. NOT literally. i met you and heart you and nothing beats that!
Miranda Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 11:11 am
It’s weird, when I read the comments earlier I thought this person was joking; some regular trying (emphasis on “trying”) to be funny. I mean, clearly she couldn’t be talking about the same Mocha we all know and love!
There are enough haters everywhere else in life, and I think on your own blog it should be all about you. Whether others like it or not.
Heather B. Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 11:21 am
Something crazy is going on with the internet lately. Not sure if they need wu wei, a beating or a stiff drink. Either way, it really needs to stop.
Oh and punching someone in the face is totally the way to go when being called a racial slur. Seriously. Or maybe I’m just violent and that brings out the ultra-violent in me.
Mercy Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 11:39 am
Rip em to shreds baby.
Come to my blog & giggle this weekend…it’s just to funny…”hop” on over.
hugs!
Mercy
Dana Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 11:41 am
Freakin’ A…
Mocha, the person who commented so hurtfully and hastily obviously does NOT know you. For all the things she assumed about you are not even close to your true personality.
We love your sarcasm and your humor and you have such scathing wit that we love! We are smart enough, and know you well enough, to be able to detect when you are serious and when you are playin’ for fun.
This person has no clue and there is something wrong in her life that she felt like transferring her hate onto you. I pity her.
The fact that you are Mocha and you are always being yourself is what we love about you.
=hugs galore=
Dana
bree Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 11:46 am
MochaKel…your sign could read
“Hey Linda…really hate me now?”
haha
*here’s to a good time at the game! Even if it takes a payday loan to pay for those beers!
JoAnn Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 1:22 pm
Can I hire you come to my town and work your magic on people I loathe? Please, pretty please? I haven’t been on in a long time and I’m really missing all this juciness. I’ll have to catch up on Monday!
I’ll pay your airfare!
Neil Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 2:09 pm
I have a vague feeling that this was a disgruntled NY Mets fan.
Betsy Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 2:29 pm
Sheesh. Someone either has a serious case of PMS or has serious anger issues. Maybe it’s the parent of that bottle-throwing boy…she found you out, Mocha!
Two points I would like to make:
1. Isn’t talking about yourself the point of a blog? Opinions, feelings, life’s occasions and experiences in life…it should all be me me me me me!
2. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. Can it be any easier than that?
Tom Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 4:08 pm
That must have been Latte Linda, the evil sister of Java Jill.
dragon-mum Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 4:41 pm
In the spirit of things I will attempt to tame my normal dragon temper, and refrain from hunting down lame arsed commentors.
Seriously, is her life THAT BORING? Is someone FORCING her to read a blog she so obviously disagrees with? See that little box up there on the right hand side up the top. The one with the X. Press that and bugger off
Lastly, how utterly pathetic. To leave such a nasty comment on a blog you hate. THEN to have the audacity to enquire as to WHY your comment was not shown. So bloody funny.
So it wasn’t even a “your blog sucks” (flip bird) leave and never come back. It was a “drop a nasty comment and wait to see what the reaction is”.
You need to go find someone else to needle sweetheart. This Mocha, our Kelly, SHE HAS FANGS AND THEY DRIP THE VENOM OF WELL USED AND PLACED BARBS FORMED OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. And you, you haven’t a hope in hell.
See how good I was
I thought long and hard before I typed. Extra special hugs and kisses. Have an awesome time at the game.
Love Yvonne
Linda Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 5:43 pm
Different Linda here. I just gotta make sure I’m not connected to that poor vitriolic whatever-she-is. Though I comment rarely I am a daily reader here. I have only one other blog that is a daily read. I arrived last summer and read all your posts at the other place and followed here. As a middle school parapro (or paraed, depending on where you live and work)my initial interest was piqued by the literacy coach description. My area of endeavor is with the SpEd kiddos. I am always on the lookout for tips to help my darling bits of hormones on feet. How little I knew about the world of blogging! But your sense of humor, obvious love for kids, absolute devotion to family (personal and public), addiction to the printed word, etc. struck a loud crashing chord within me and I’ve been a (blush) fan ever since. So to you, Lovely Mocha Lady, I want to be permitted the occasional word or two here. Hence the long explanation/denial/whatever to make it abso-positively Windex clear she is NOT and never has nor ever will speak for this Linda. She is a pathetic thing that needs to wash her mind and tongue and, for sure, her fingers. You keep on shining on us. Thanks for being a great lady.
P.S. Is Mason giving Tom Clancy a try? Hope so.
Mommela Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 7:12 pm
Hey, I’m a Tigers fan and I still love your blog!
Tracey Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 8:02 pm
Only positive attitudes at this point! I can’t believe she had the nerve to say such awful things about you! I noticed that she hasn’t commented on this one yet…
Much love!!
T
Elizabeth Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 8:55 pm
Yeah, what they all said!
What a great game!! I hope you had a blast, Kelly! I kept looking for you on TV but I couldn’t spot the pompous, self-centered, self-important, greedy, capitalistic, in-your-face, show-offy, gorgeous-gal-in-fantastic-shoes-chick.
ST. LOUIS CARDINALS!!! WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONS!!! Woot Woot!!!
Devra Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 10:19 pm
I never went for that kind of thing in highschool, so I am not plannin’to be re-living it as an adult either. I think some people, like the vitriolic Linda, get behind a keyboard and screen and it’s like they are drinkin’ a ton of tequila and drunk dialing. Or maybe that is what happened here. Maybe Vitriolic Linda just needs and intervention as well as A.A.
I am sad that the Mets didn’t make it to the WS, but our son is a huge Cardinal’s fan, so I am really happy for his happiness! And your’s too Mocha ; )
flyingpurplemoose Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 10:19 pm
Woah! I am too tired to even comment properly on something like this. I guess it is too bad that some people have to put others down. Karma will get em! Love the comment trolls snippet!
QofS Said,
October 27, 2006 @ 10:31 pm
Since you’re not home yet…I’m just going to get this out of the way now…
SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Life. Sucked. Out. Of Me.
Mother in tears. Father in tears. Stupid snatchface poo holes.
R Burgess Said,
October 28, 2006 @ 9:00 am
I thought I was on the “Everyone Else BUT Mocha” blog, but it seems I’ve encountered the “Self-Centered Mocha” blog!
I mean, who else did she think you were going to talk about?
Oh, and come to think of it, you do seem somewhat capitalistic. You use a lot of CAPITAL letters in your blog!
Take care!
R
Cordaville Said,
October 28, 2006 @ 3:10 pm
I wanna be just like you when I grow up! Way to go!
Hugs,
Cordaville
Jill Said,
October 29, 2006 @ 7:03 am
I am gone for a few weeks and come back to see that you are once again proving how strong of a person you really are… I don’t quite understand why some people have to be so anal retentive as to think they need to downplay or slam other people’s blogs… keep up the work you do… some of us actually like it and think you are awesome…
Jill
Her Bad Mother Said,
October 29, 2006 @ 5:36 pm
I’m totally with you on the ‘it’s my blog and I’ll yell at whoever I like’ school of blogtard-management - sometimes ignoring them just isn’t satisfying. I’ve had some evil ones, and every time I smacked back. Because I can.
You GO.
Mom101 Said,
October 29, 2006 @ 6:53 pm
I love you in a million ways, and only 47 of them are because of this post.
I’m not a fan of “show-offy” as an adjective, nor people who use it in all seriousness. And to presume that one’s comment is entitled to see the light of day seems pretty “show-offy” in itself, no?
Dear dissatisfied reader: we are all self-centered in a way. Thus, we blog. Case closed.