Not so much you as me. And by me I mean that you should pay attention to the lessons I’m learning so that this advice really IS for you. So, yes. It’s for you.
My family teased me about the way I was doing some things differently this year for Thanksgiving (namely, getting tanked on the crunk juice the night before). However, some of them turned out just fine.
Instead of making an entire pan of stuffing/dressing I sprayed my muffin tin (didn’t that sound dirty just now?) with cooking spray and then made stuffing muffins. Everyone argues over getting the crunchy corners anyway because they’re the best part. This way, everyone has the crunchy corner and it’s in a perfect serving size.
Instead of taking a day off this week to clean the house before company gets here I opted for the second best piece of advice: If you can’t deep clean, deep hide. They never checked the study room to see that the ottoman was in there because I didn’t get a chance to get it cleaned NOR did they see the FULL BASKET OF CLEAN CLOTHES that got shoved in there.
When making a mix-and-refrigerate cheesecake that doesn’t set up properly, put it in the freezer for half an hour. Any more and you’ll have to nuke it in the microwave to get it back but then it will be soggy and didn’t we just try to stop that from happening? Best to order a cheesecake next year from Eli’s.
That’s all for now. Do you need some advice on something? Let me know. I’m all about bossing everyone around and telling them things to fix their lives and make them better.
It’s a gift, you know.
November 25, 2006 @ 8:32 am | Filed under NaBloPoMo | Permalink |
Suebob Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 9:43 am
Stuffing muffings. Brilliant.
Elizabeth Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 10:18 am
I can’t get past the stuffing muffins. What a fabulous idea.
You really DO have a gift, Kelly. I’m not worthy!!
Natalie Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 10:38 am
Yes, in fact, I do need some advice.
Just recently, I got my hair cut and had a highlight. The highlights didn’t really come out so great because he cut first (I went short) and then highlighted. I thought this was totally backwards but what do I know? I am not the professional who charged me $125 for this service.
So, my question is: do I call him back and tell him I want it fixed and risk him mucking it up? Or should I just call it a learning experience and go to someone else next time?
Yours truly,
Nataliehaven’tseenyaforawhilehowyadoin’?
Tom Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 11:35 am
DEEP HIDE is always an option in my house. Anyone who has kids should know that.
Natalie- Borrow one of Kelly’s hats.
field negro Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 12:22 pm
Mmmm, I need to know how to spice up those turkey sandwiches I will be eating for the next three weeks:)
BTW, I love your site.
RWA Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 12:44 pm
I like the “hiding” idea. I do it myself - frequently.
The stuffing muffins are also great.
mizangie Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 12:55 pm
What kind of stuffing do you make? I don’t know if my cornbread stuffing would hold together in muffin-form. I’ve made stuffing balls (teehee, I said balls) before as a holiday appetizer. Those got an interesting response. So interesting that I’ve never done that again.
The doors on my closets and spare room bulge outward due to all the “hiding” I’ve done. It worked out so great that I’ve completely stopped cleaning. I only hide. And if someone comes to the door unexpectedly and things are not hidden, then I hide myself and don’t answer the door. Works out even better!!
Mocha Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 3:43 pm
Suebob - Try it. You’ll love it. And me. Even more.
Elizabeth - Oh, you are, too!
Natalie - First of all: HEY, GIRLFRIEND, I’m doing fine. Secondly, $125? For your white-girl hair? We’ve talked about this before haven’t we? Well, I can only hope you have the brass cojones to march right back to that salon, bitch-slap the person who did this to you, and then ask for the best hairstylist there. You look in the owner/manager’s eyes and say, “I’m not leaving here until this is remedied. What are you going to do about it?” and then don’t say a word. Let me know what you do. Also, send a picture. Before and after, please.
Tom - Deep Hide is just about all I do. I didn’t mean to lead you into thinking that I ever deep clean. Sorry.
field-negro - That’s a funny name. A friend just called me a “house negro” the other day. Hmmm. Good times. Ok, here’s my remedy for a boring turkey sandwich. First, it has to be on good bread, include mayo and then top it off with some homemade cranberry-raspberry sauce that my mother makes. If you need that recipe I might be coerced into posting it. Move over Paula Deen.
RWA - Do you ever hide too well? That might be a topic for another advice session, whaddya think?
MizAngie - Stuffing balls is also a Christmas game. Did you know that? The cornbread stuffing will work just fine. Here’s a tip: whatever you use to moisten it (water, chicken broth) just make sure there’s enough of it so that it’s moist enough. Too dry and this thing won’t work. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to try it with the cornbread stuffing and get back to me, mmkay?
Aafrica Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 4:56 pm
sounds like Thanksgiving was a total success lol! but i thought the ‘deep hide’ was my invention.
B Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 5:01 pm
OH my goodness…I LOVE the muffin tin idea! I think I may cook ALL my side dishes like that from now on…and it will only help in my obsession that everyone take equal portions of everything.
Dana Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 7:59 pm
The Stuffing Muffins sounds awesome! Great idea!!!
I made a blueberry cheesecake torte and oh did it set. I’m eating some now, and it’s delish! Want me to send you some?
Belinda Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 8:38 pm
The advice I need today is in my Saturday post, bookending it. It has to do with tree-trimming. There is also some explicit instruction for you personally in that post, so be sure to visit.
And I have to tell you, my mind is reeling, positively REELING with the genius that is Stuffing Muffins! Trademark that name immediately!
field negro Said,
November 25, 2006 @ 10:06 pm
Thanks MM! I hooked up that bad boy with wheat bread and lots of mayo
Peace.
Chookooloonks Said,
November 26, 2006 @ 5:12 am
“If you can’t deep clean, deep hide”: Best. Advice. Ever.
Must say, however, I’ve lived “deep hide” all my freakin’ life. I wouldn’t know what “deep clean” was if it got in bed with me.
You’re all nastified now, aren’t you…
Mocha Momma Said,
November 26, 2006 @ 8:21 am
Y’all like that “Stuffing Muffins” thing? Wow. I’m contacting a patent lawyer right now. I’ll make some for everyone, too. Only if Dana sends the blueberry cheesecake torte and if the rest of you stop getting nastified (nastified? HILARIOUS) with Chookooloonks’ comment.
RWA Said,
November 26, 2006 @ 8:45 pm
I want to add “Math Manipulatives” to the list. This quote is great…
“I watched it last night since my class was cancelled. And let me just say: I want McSteamy. He is beautiful. This quiche right here I’m eating? I could eat this off his bare stomach.”