I was so enormously tickled by Miz Angie’s comment yesterday that it prompted something in me. Especially the “heifer” part. But I’m partial to the “high yella heifer” that I’ve been called so often in my lifetime. Still, it jump-started something.
The need to write. Not the want to respond per se, but the need to put pen to paper.
Or fingers to keyboard. You get my drift.
Let’s establish here and now that not one thing was offensive to me or taken the wrong way. It’s probably due to the fact that I’ve never been the person whom everyone thinks things work out for. In fact, most things come difficult for me but I work at making them look easy. Like when you trip over your own feet, tumble, do a graceful somersault and say, “I meant to do that.” Getting prepared for that job interview in front of nine people was daunting and the thing that irks me the most is that I feel like I wasted my time because it was a done deal before I walked in there.
And nobody told me. Nobody knew.
Still, it’s past. I’m done with it and will chalk it up to a good experience. Do you know what I feel great about? The fact that I interviewed well and had a good, solid, well-prepared answer for everything. I couldn’t have done any better and have promised myself that I won’t take it personally because it wasn’t me. It wasn’t for me, either. Obviously.
Things rarely “work out for me”. Most of my decisions are reactions to other stupid decisions I’ve made. It fits well with my “do first, ask forgiveness later” mantra. But, for the most part, I don’t ever think anyone wants to be me or be like me or mirror my life. That’s just not been how things work out in my existence.
Yesterday I told some colleagues that I’m going on my first vacation. Ever. I’ve gone on “family trips” and once JUST ONCE we rented a chalet with some friends of ours in the Smoky Mountains. One of the teachers exclaimed, “What? Are you serious? Nu-huhhh. This isn’t your first vacation! Is it?” But it is. It’s the first time I’ve booked a flight (not for a business trip) and rented a condo (instead of a hotel) and planned on doing nothing except reading a book on the beach.
Without kids. Without the husband. Just me and a girlfriend who is getting her master’s degree with me.
No schedule. No big plans. Nobody asking me to watch them play XBox or find them AA batteries or make them a sandwich.
We decided that we couldn’t wait until this summer to take a break and that we’d been working really hard for two years and this trip was going to happen AND HAPPEN NOW BEFORE MY FAMILY VISITED ME IN PRISON FOR MAIMING BABY PANDAS AND CRUSHING UP THEIR BONES BECAUSE OF THE STRESS.
So… no. No one’s ever wanted to be me. Except maybe some people will be just a wee bit jealous for my time on a Florida beach next week. But I’ll be a tan heifer by that time. I’m certain that mostly people will be happy for me and know how much I need this vacation.
See you when I get back.
March 30, 2007 @ 5:00 am | Filed under Everyday Mundane | Permalink |
Dave2 Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 5:39 am
Must be contagious. I just planned my first REAL VACATION in just over a decade.
OddMix Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 6:18 am
I hope you have a very, very, very good time. Come back refreshed.
themikestand Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 6:29 am
Does that mean there’s a vacant Xbox controller at your place? Y’know, I’ve been meaning to get into that, but never had the offer come up.
Have a great trip. Don’t forget to reapply.
inthefastlane Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 6:35 am
I am not sure what job you were interviewing for, but I will say that I have gone through 2 interviews in schools were the schools already know who they want to hire, but they pretend like they are going through the process anyway. It is one of the things that I HATE about schools. The politics and the “favors” that happen are ridiculous.
I hope you have a great vacation. That sounds absolutely fantastic.
dawn Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 7:24 am
I find more often than not, schools know who they want for an admin job. It sucks and is wrong…But the beach is oh so very right. Have a great trip. I am jealous of your trip…enjoy your break. It sounds divine.
-s. Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 7:27 am
Have a great vacation. Have a frozen mocha for me while you are there. Let me know what flavor it was when you get back.
-S.
Jennifer Smith Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 7:28 am
Wow!!! What a wonderful idea! Have a great relaxing time. You deserve it.
MeL Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 7:41 am
Don’t forget to pack your tiara and wand - no Fairy Godmother worth her pixie dust would leave home without them.
The wand is especially useful should you have the need to swat a particularly yummy cabana boy on the rear in order to hasten his retrieval of your next frosty-cold adult beverage.
Oh, and I’ve missed you.
deannie Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 7:46 am
I am going on my first vacation next week too! (Is it spring break there next for you too?). Taking my babee with me on a cruise! Yee Haw!
Have a wonderful time.
Hugs,
Hilly Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 8:02 am
Have a wonderful time, miss diva. I need to do the same thing….go on a vacation and leave all of my drama and worries behind. Maybe I will follow your lead =).
KC Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 10:00 am
We always look at others and wish we could be more like them - the grass is greener on the other side - sorta deal. Its inevitable… we admire someones else’s strength, determination, courage, passion etc… and wish we had some degree of it. Even if we have had a rough go at our life - someone out there has had it far worst and looks at us as though it a breezy walk in the park.
Take your MUCH DESERVED vacation… it would totally suck a$$ having to write you letters to block cell B5, inmate #358817 (I like making up numbers). I would be afraid to start getting letters from Big Momma from the cell over… Oye! Have a blast… and RELAX!!!! Perspective is an amazing thing and usually comes when on vacation!
Ciao bella,
KC
Ami Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 10:53 am
Well, I’ve been out of the loop until now, so I didn’t have the opportunity to offer any platitudes (you can thank me later). It sounds like you’re doing much better now that you’ve had some time to cool off. I’m totally jealous about the vacation, and I’m with Angie–I’ve been secretly envious of your “perfect” existence, too! This was a great reminder that what we see (or in your case, read) isn’t always the whole story. Thanks for being perfectly imperfect, just like the rest of us! :o)
Dana Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 12:01 pm
Happy Vacation, Mocha!
leigh Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 12:32 pm
I’m mostly a lurker (the non-stalker type) and I wanted to say that I hope you have the most relaxing vacation ever….I just went on my first one last month with some girlfriends for one’s 40th birthday. Very nice.
Missy Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 12:44 pm
Putting all envious and jealous thoughts aside…I hope you have a fantastic time down in Florida…
If you see my grandmother say HI! She’ll be the old lady with white hair and flip flops…name is Irene.
I wish you had booked a flight to Hawaii…next time? There are some great cabins we could stay in on the beach for CHEAP (military rates etc)…
Then of courses there is always Waikiki:)
Happy Vacation!
Rebecca Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 5:33 pm
Have a great trip, Mocha! Glad to see you back!
nelle2nelle Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 8:32 pm
Writing is cathartic, at least in my world. I’m on cloud 94357-B… wave on the way by!
chris Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 9:07 pm
YEY! That sounds like so much fun! Have a blast!
Janice Said,
March 30, 2007 @ 9:41 pm
A tan heifer? Hmmm ok…sorta like mocha latte? Lame I know.
You are not alone in the “never taken a real vacation” department. I’ve been on one to the Keys with an ex boyfriend and we stayed at his dad’s. Doesn’t count. Some day I plan to go on a “real” vacation by myself.
Enjoy yourself no swimming for at least 30 minutes after you’ve eaten…:)
becky Said,
April 1, 2007 @ 8:58 pm
we took our first-ever vacation last november. it was heavenly. i highly recommend it before you get desperate enough to kill baby pandas. i rode the high from that vacation for 2 months - it was THAT good.
furiousball Said,
April 2, 2007 @ 8:54 am
I haven’t unplugged in nearly 6 years, which just so happens to be the same amount of time I’ve been married by chance… or not. Life is a fucker, good for you to go get yourself some unwind time. Just don’t forget the unwind time…or the booze.
G Said,
April 2, 2007 @ 10:11 am
I just came back from a fun vacation. It was my honeymoon. It was on the beach. I shouldn’t be permitted to be jealous of yours, having just returned from my own less than a month ago. But I am. A little. Enjoy it!
Sarah Said,
April 2, 2007 @ 2:31 pm
Have an awesome vacation and relax and rejuvinate yourself. I’ve never been on a real vacation like that either, but I’ve got tons of time! Have a great time!!
Mike Said,
April 2, 2007 @ 4:24 pm
5 to 1 odds you just stay in FLA. and dodn’t come back.
Yvonne Said,
April 2, 2007 @ 6:36 pm
Have a fantastic time relaxing and recharging the batteries my love. You deserve it.
Lara Said,
April 5, 2007 @ 11:24 pm
dood, why am i always so late on your posts these days? it makes me sad. i found out you had posted, and i felt like i’d woken up and missed christmas morning. i hope your vacation is amazing and restorative.
KC Said,
April 6, 2007 @ 8:50 am
Hope you are having a great time…
Just stoping in to wish you and your family an excellent Easter holiday!
Ciao bella,
KC
BotchedExperiment Said,
April 7, 2007 @ 8:02 am
You know, if I were you I’d pass this trip off as an essential medical treatment. Since people are calling you yella (FYI: Alex Haley says “yaller.” I like it better. It sounds more colloquial) you must have jaundice, and an effective treatment for it is exposure to the sun’s UV rays.
So after you get back, I’d say you’re still first in line for a vacation.
EricAtRandom Said,
April 7, 2007 @ 10:52 am
Hey you! I’m trying to get back to being a “responsible member of the blogging community once again.” I totally sympathize (sp?) with you on the job interview thing. I’m in that boat, myself now, and have had the joy of staring down a panel of four people only to come out thinking they had plans other than hiring me all along. In any case, ya gotta keep trying.
At least you have the confidence to realize you had good answers to their questions.
I hope you enjoyed (or are enjoying) your vacation. Drop me a note if you happen to get this! Maybe I can meet up with you for a quick hug!
Take care,
Eric
Tiggerlane Said,
April 7, 2007 @ 10:00 pm
Good for YOU!! You deserve it!
I did the same thing a few weeks ago - I had NEVER had a family vacation as a child, and only started taking them once I got married (unless you count 6 years of spring breaks while in college). NEVER had I been without the husband or child, and I went to DC with a friend, while our kids were participating in a leadership forum. We handed them off at the airport, and then had a week to ourselves before we had the return flight with them.
I can’t tell you how nice it was to have some “me” time, after 13 years of raising The Offspring. Hope it goes well for you, too!
Happy vacation, and look forward to your return!
MizAngie Said,
April 8, 2007 @ 4:35 pm
Wow. My jealousy won me a “shout out.” That’s a LOT better than what my jealousy usually gets me. Ha! I am THANKFUL that you took a vacation. All these months I’ve been reading your blog has made me TIRED from reading about all the things you do. I needed this vacation as much as you did.
Thank goodness I didn’t offend you with my craziness. I was hoping you’ve read me enough to recognize sarcasm and teasing. It was a risk, I know. Words are so powerful. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt your feelings or piss you off. Your’s is one of the first spaces I got hooked on and I think so highly of you and am so proud of your accomplishments.
I hope your spirit is refreshed after your time on the beach. Now, get back up on that horse what throwed ya and show ‘em who’s boss!
Josh Said,
April 8, 2007 @ 5:41 pm
Hey….
You have fun on your vacation…it’s WELL deserved. I’m sorry about the interview…that really stinks. See you when you get back…