All In One Week:
1. A student who’s been in trouble before for engaging in Ultimate Fighting Championships outside of school grounds (and then having them play on cell phones and MySpace pages) gets in trouble again. He tells the assistant principal who does the discipline for my grade level that we need more Black teachers “up in this school”. The assistant principal tells him that if he feels that way he should remember who his guidance dean is and would he like to be referred to my office to talk to me. “No. She ain’t Black enough.”
Alrighty then.
2. A chronically truant student commits the following offenses this school year: wearing low cut tops and failing to follow proper dress code, leaving school grounds in the middle of the day, cussing out teachers and administrators. When I put her in the after school program to regain some high school credits her mother throws a fit and tries to go over my head. I fight it by re-writing the report I sent the week before and trying to prove to the review committee that she really needs this program in order to stay on track for graduation. Her mother still fights it. I win. Her mother calls me to yell at me to stop picking on her daughter. I calmly explain the side of the story of the school and how this will be a good thing. It’s after school SCHOOL that she can begin at 3:30 (“for crying out loud!” was ringing in my head the whole time along with lots of inaudible yet exasperated sighs) and then she says no, there’s no bus at that time. I fix the bus situation. She then says that she won’t come in to talk to the administrators her daughter cussed out and called “motherfuckers”. “Where you there?” she accuses me. “How do you know they’re not lying!?” I explain that I stand by my colleagues and she tells me we’re just prejudiced against her daughter. I ask her to explain that one. “Because she’s Black!” she yells at me. My calmness takes on a new tone and I am breathing slowly before saying, “Well, ok but I’m Black and I’ve disciplined her for wearing a low-cut top the first day of the after school program right before she cussed out other people.” Mom hangs up on me.
I’m 0 for 2 this week.
3. Come on, people. Let’s use some common sense.
4. There’s too much school-related stuff currently irking me and causing me to consider investing in a muzzle for myself. Must. Bang. Head. On. Desk. Until. Am. Dead.
5. Non-school related: Good on you, hometown. I blame my caffeinated self on YOU.
Who has a vat I can borrow so that I can drown myself in frothy coffee? Anyone? I promise that I’ll clean it out and if you really have issues with the coffee staining I can use something that won’t discolor. Gin and vodka both clean easily.
Or so I hear.
November 7, 2007 @ 8:11 pm | Filed under NaBloPoMo | Permalink |
Mrs RW Said,
November 7, 2007 @ 9:44 pm
“Because she’s Black!” she yells at me. My calmness takes on a new tone and I am breathing slowly before saying, “Well, ok but I’m Black and I’ve disciplined her for wearing a low-cut top the first day of the after school program right before she cussed out other people.”
How did you resist saying something along the lines of “I don’t care if she’s purple with green spots and I’m orange and blue. We have the same set of rules for everyone and if that’s discrimination then you need a dictionary so you can look up the definition of ‘discrimination’”.
Sheesh…does your back itch? It must be the little baby angel wings sprouting. If I were in your position I would’ve have murdered at least 50 parents by now.
Tom Said,
November 7, 2007 @ 9:46 pm
About #4
The urge to spew about what is irking me at work is hard to resist. I made the mistake of using the name of my golf course on my blog, so I have to keep the work stuff P.C. Except for that time a porno was filmed on hole 16. Porno always makes for good blogging.
Tricia Said,
November 7, 2007 @ 10:14 pm
Serious question- just wanted to prepare you.
Does the race card come up for you all the time? Always in your face like this?
joelle blackstarr Said,
November 7, 2007 @ 10:40 pm
My, but, you certainly have some drama going on at all times. Props to ya for your coolness. Our schools are rough here in Philly. Do you think much about retaliating students like we’ve heard so much about lately? Stay safe. I can’t believe that NYC and Phila. are among the least caffeinated cities. I do my part - a pot a day, first thing. Hang loose. Peace.
Belinda Said,
November 7, 2007 @ 11:10 pm
Does it help to know that today, I thought of you, and did something I’ve never done before, JUST FOR YOU? Blogged about it, too. Because I love you.
Shigeta Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 5:53 am
UNDERSTATEMENT: I am so very tired of the “because she’s black”….”isn’t black enough” that seems to be prevalent at your place of employment. How bout the parents take responsibility for their child’s actions AND what part they have ot have not played in that child’s decision making process and stop pulling that other nonsense out of their back pocket.
SO LATE WITH THIS ONE:
Picture of your boys from a couple of weeks ago…sheesh they are so handsome.
anonymous Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 6:22 am
Well at least you had a comeback. As a white woman who taught in DC for 12 years, I had nothing. We had black parents who would go after black teachers/administrators as being “white system” people even though they were not white. LOL
Mocha Momma Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 6:23 am
I can feel it. Today’s comments will provide tomorrow’s post. I just know it.
Erin Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 6:33 am
It is really tough to bite your tongue in that situation, and you so did the right thing. Obviously you are the elite person here. It sounds like this kid’s problem is her parents or (lack of). It usually stems back to the parenting, maybe her mother needs to look in the mirror and fix the problem. How is your back feeling?? Should be sore from carrying everyone this week. Have a great day today
Sueb0b Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 7:04 am
Say it loud…
mama's got moxie Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 9:16 am
i can’t imagine the amount of willpower you have to conjure up every day to be able to maintain your cool in those crazy situations. you all might have to get a little “joe clark” up in that piece. remember this scene from “lean on me”:
Joe Clark: I want all of you to take a good look at these people on the risers behind me. These people have been here up to five years and done absolutely nothing. These people are drug dealers and drug users. They have taken up space. They have disrupted this school. They have harassed your teachers. And they have intimidated you. Well, times are about to change. You will not be bothered in Joe Clark’s school. These people are incorrigible. And since none of them could graduate anyway, [turns to the troublemakers on stage] you are all expurgated. You are dismissed! You are out of here, forever. I wish you well!
for more inspiring joe clark quotes
:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097722/quotes
ali Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 1:48 pm
these kids and their nutty parents are lucky to have you-hang in there!
Daisy Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 3:21 pm
The problem with banging your head on the desk is that all you’ll get is a headache. I recommend the vat of coffee. You’re doing right by those kids, Mocha, whether their mamas realize it or not!
Veggie Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 5:21 pm
Ok, so there is this Proclaimers (yeah, the 1000 Miles guys) song called Everybody’s A Victim. Its very fitting. They also have one called Scotland’s Story which is a nice warm fuzzy kind of thing. My personal favorite is still She Arouses Me So, but thats another story…
Mocha Momma » 11.8.07 Said,
November 8, 2007 @ 9:06 pm
[...] could have written an entire post in yesterday’s comments about the questions I read so I’ll devote some space here instead. It’s not as if, for [...]
Julie Said,
November 9, 2007 @ 10:39 pm
I don’t know these people or your school or you other than what I occasionally read here, but my initial reaction is that what these people are really saying is, “There’s no one here who we feel can relate to us.”
Too often that sentiment comes out as someone saying that some one or another isn’t “really Black” or “Black enough” as though there is one definitive way to be Black and it can be attained by degrees or levels.
Of course there are a million different ways to “be Black” and we all find out own ways and often they have nothing at all to do with how other people think you should behave, look, think if you’re Black.
But in these situation with students at your school, I have to wonder how much their belief that there aren’t people in power who can relate to their lives and experiences contributes to their misbehavior. When you don’t think that people understand you, when you feel like your lifestyle, your culture is continually questioned, do you feel a need to assert those aspects of yourself? Do you act out as a reaction to believing that you’re not heard?
In the instance of the girl with the low-cut shirt and her mother. Yes, the girl broke the rules, and yes, you went out of your way to do things that will most likely be good for her in the long run. But, I understand why her mother hung up on you. The reality is that some Black people see discrimination when it doesn’t exist because they’ve experienced so much real discrimination. To dismiss concerns of discrimination by off-handedly saying - “I’m Black,” is pretty weak, and borderline offensive.
It implies that Black people don’t discriminate against other Black people - and you’d have be almost intentionally dense to believe that. But mostly, it’s a simple dismissal - and no one likes to have their concerns dismissed as being unworthy of discussion.
Even if that mother was wrong. Even if there’s no way that her daughter was being discriminated against in anyway - didn’t she deserve to have that concern taken seriously for a moment? Didn’t she deserve to be reassured that this was not the case? Because you know that she has probably faced plenty of situations where her perception of discrimination was spot on. And I think, from her point of view, that another Black person, who had been subjected to discrimination at some point in their lives would have been sensitive enough to recognize that and to treat her accordingly. So dismissing her by saying, “I’m Black,” was really a way of diminishing your Blackness rather than affirming it to her.
At least that’s how it came across to me. And I have certainly been on both sides of this coin. Most often I’ve been accused of being not Black enough, but I’ve gotten “too Black” thrown at me too. Sometimes you can’t win. But sometimes you stack the cards against yourself too.
Mocha Momma » 11.13.07 Said,
November 13, 2007 @ 7:07 pm
[...] Tricia asked me a question on this post which led to this post and then she left this comment: I’ll have to read this again when I have [...]
dana Said,
November 15, 2007 @ 12:06 pm
I know I’m late with my comment, but holy cats. I can’t believe how that mom treated you!