This morning I’m in charge of the 9th grade orientation because half of those kids are mine. We’re going on a tour of the building, practicing opening lockers, and then registering them for classes. Today will be a long, long day. My voice will probably go out by the end of the day and I will wonder, once again, why students have never tried to open a padlock in their 14 years of life thus far. What I know about myself is that I will wonder a lot of things. Some of them are just to serve the purpose of exasperating myself because there are no answers. Others will be because I am trying to figure people out and see what their motives are for doing things.
High school is a difficult beast. We get students who are terrified of being there because the building is big and I admit, ours is pretty enormous and maze-like. We’ve restructured almost everything about it and there are four separate academies, one of which is in my charge. I’m keeping half of the freshmen from last year who I had as their dean and I’m getting half of the incoming freshmen that I’ll be meeting today. When I crunched the numbers it’s about the same as I was dealing with last year and my role, which is new to both me and the district, will be an Academy Assistant Principal.
In many ways, I’ll be the “principal” over my own little school. That’s about 350 students and 20 teachers to work with; some of whom are going to be evaluated because it’s “their year” and just now I’m understanding that I have to work with a lot of personalities. It won’t be fair to write about my dealings with them on a personal or professional level, though I know I will want to explore things in writing. When I do, it would make sense to give them anonymity. Yet, there are several hundred students and families I will meet and cultivate relationships with; I’ll most definitely need this morning to introduce myself and establish who I am in this position.
Today I am wondering what souls I will be intertwined with for the space of a school year.
Today I am irritated that some families won’t bother to start their children in school until after Labor Day because they’re “on vacation”.
Today I am the woman who will, no doubt, be called a bitch because it is the easiest slander to revert to when they are frustrated with me.
Today I am astounded that some of my students live in filth and poverty and ignorance.
Today I am grateful for loving parents who are trying their absolute best to make good on a bad situation.
Today I will let parents know that I do not serve to enable their children.
Today I will give an example of being a responsible citizen and I will use that example time and time again because only a few will be able to hear it today. For others, the message will come later on.
Today I will remember that everyone learns at different paces and that the learning curve is steep.
Today I will tell them why I am there knowing that they will question me sometimes when they have forgotten.
Today I will smile at children masquerading as mature high school students who desperately need the very tenderness they will refuse until I gain their trust.
Today I will be hard on the boys for their saggy pants and the girls for their revealing tops and remind them that they are here to exercise THEIR BRAINS and that their bodies are not for display.
Today I will impart wisdom that has been hanging around in the crevices of my psyche that will, no doubt, surprise me when they come to the surface.
Today I will love someone new and it will sneak up on me like it always does.
Today I am the Moral Gatekeeper for what works in schools because I have been around just that long.
Today I will second guess decisions and I will, as sure as the sun comes up, make wrong ones. It will have to wait until tomorrow that I can make it right again assuming that I even recognize it.
Today I am an educator who will protect children and piss off those who fail to recognize that.
Today I am the woman who might hold it together all day until she gets into her car and loses her shit at the end of a punishing day.
Today I am the woman who will reach out to pat a student on the back or simply hug them. People will tell me not to do that and I have yet to regret doing so because I exercise good judgment when doing so.
Today I am the administrator who has moved to the Dark Side and “doesn’t understand what it’s like in the classroom” and there is nothing I can do to change anyone’s mind about that. It’s ok.
Today I am the principal who simply can’t make everything right or fix society’s ills but who will be infuriated nonetheless.
Tonight I will return home entirely exhausted. It’s not even the first day of school.
August 6, 2008 @ 5:06 am | Filed under Education, Uncategorized | Permalink |
Heather B. Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 5:14 am
Question: Is your school a Title I school?
Oh and you know you can always vent to me because I am required to care both as your friend and because I enjoy getting paid every other week.
Heather B.s last blog post..El Fin
mommymae Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 5:39 am
“Today I will let parents know that I do not serve to enable their children.”
-as a former educator, i always wished the parents would do the same. it would make it all too easy though, wouldn’t it? i hope you have a great day and school year.
mommymaes last blog post..photo sesh and castor oil
Amelia Sprout Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 5:50 am
I am in awe of you and all the people who do what you do. Those are some damn lucky kids, parents and teachers, even if they don’t realize it now.
Amelia Sprouts last blog post..Another year older
Miss Britt Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 6:43 am
I’ve read a lot and talked to a lot and known a lot of teachers.
It’s cool to see inside the mind of an administrator for a moment, and be reminded that they are still teachers too.
Miss Britts last blog post..Would you like to be me for a day?
dawn Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 6:43 am
Today you will be a role model for your students living what they can achieve.
You rock and as a teacher I would want a principal just like you.
dawns last blog post..Aren’t I Lucky
All Adither Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 6:44 am
Today you rock. What a job you have!
Busy Mom Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 6:51 am
Today I wish you lived here with me, I have a 9th grader, now.
Busy Moms last blog post..Summer. Please report back to my office.
Trish Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 7:04 am
I’m really trying to keep my nose out of your ass (nice as your ass is though) but I really do wish that we had more people like you in the education system. I wish we had more parents who accepted and, more importantly, respected educators such as yourself. It’s a shame to see that a lot of parents feel they don’t need to be involved and put all of it on the schools. I’m afraid I’ll be one of “those” parents that is too involved, if there is such a thing anymore. High school was bad enough for me, (gangs, drugs - teachers and kids),I hope there are caring souls like you for my kids when they get there.
Trishs last blog post..Some Weekend Fun
kimblahg Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 7:04 am
“Today I am the woman who will, no doubt, be called a bitch because it is the easiest slander to revert to when they are frustrated with me.”
You are right, calling someone a bitch is an easy way to excuse your own behavior. I hope you get more hugs and smiles and less name calling today. Good luck!
kimblahgs last blog post..recessing
Assertagirl Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 7:27 am
You’re so inspirational, Kelly. Those kids have no idea how lucky they are to have you in their court. Hopefully there will be a nice bottle of red waiting for you when you get home.
Assertagirls last blog post..The First Ever Assertagirl Caption Contest
Cynthia Samuels Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:08 am
Today I am — grateful that I have a friend who offers so much to so many
Today I am — moved as I consider the spectrum of your days
Today I am — hoping that your are strengthened by all the love and admiration for you flying around in Blogland
Today I am — writing a really corny post, but every time I think about what you do and what it takes to do it I just get all mushy. So tough.
Pam Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:14 am
You are at your absolute best when you talk about teaching. Who wouldn’t fall in love with you?
Pams last blog post..Where the Turf Meets the Surf
JenniferB Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:15 am
I am sending virtual chocolate — NOW. And hugs. The chocolate will soothe the savaged soul and the hugs will just make you feel tingly.
Shash Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:22 am
Today you are … inspiring.
I start in less than 10 days. I’m excited and nervous. Now I’m inspired.
Go get ‘em, girl!
Shash
xoxo
Shashs last blog post..Only In My House #2
Maria Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:38 am
Today you are amazing.
Great post.
Marias last blog post..“…and this is my partner, Ovaltine Jenkins.”
Ellen Gerstein Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 9:08 am
And so it begins. You have one lucky group of kids there. Lucky because they have you. You may never know when or how you will impact them, but you will, and it will stay with them for the rest of their lives.
Ellen Gersteins last blog post..Meme me
Elizabeth Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 9:12 am
“Today I will love someone new and it will sneak up on me like it always does.”
This is why we love you, chica. I’m inspired by the commitment you have and the determination you possess.
Elizabeths last blog post..TMI
merlotmom Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 9:46 am
The fact that you’ve considered and are aware of the above already puts you at the top of the list. These kids (and they’re parents) are lucky to have you even if they don’t know it yet. Good luck today.
merlotmoms last blog post..Making Lemonade Out of Lemons - Sort Of
Amanda Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 10:01 am
Today I am no longer a lurker!
As a teacher I greatly appreciated your post and just felt the need to say so.
If only more administrators looked at education like you do perhaps more teachers would stay in the profession. Thank you for all you do.
huskerbeck Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 10:45 am
Today I am glad I am not you… It’s a good thing the Lord made people like you, because if everyone was like me there wouldn’t be any teachers or principals. I admire your patience and tenacity. And willingness to put yourself through this year after year.
huskerbecks last blog post..Something fun from Pattie…
Maria Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 11:34 am
I hated high school. But I bet it would have been better if mine had been lucky enough to have someone like you in charge.
You have a really difficult job, plus the hormones and growing pains of 350 kids, their overactive or uninvolved parents, and thats all before lunch! Good luck.
Daisy Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 12:28 pm
Oh, Kelly, tears. You’ll touch souls, I know you will. You know you will. The hardest part (for me) is knowing that I won’t know which souls change for the better because I touch them; I simply have to trust. Trust, and keep teaching.
I’m under observation this year because it’s the magical “every third year”. You could come obeserve, me, okay? I’m sure my principal wouldn’t mind taking a break, and I promise to provide the coffee.
Daisys last blog post..Blog the Recession in August!
Daisy Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 12:28 pm
An yes, I can spell. Really. it’s “observe”, already.
Daisys last blog post..Blog the Recession in August!
Gary LaPointe Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 12:43 pm
Wow, orientation already! We don’t start school until after Labor Day (by law). We actually start on Wednesday. And if was my choice we’d start the week after OLNY because of the parents who wait to register and/or bring their kids back.
MeL Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 1:04 pm
You can do this. Of course. And you WILL do this. And you will be exhausted, and you will be wrung out, and you will end the day knowing that you do it because you were born to do this. You educate more then just your students; you educate anyone around you who is willing to pay attention. Thank you for my ongoing education.
You will do this. They will all be the luckier for it. And you will do it even better tomorrow, because you’re you.
MeLs last blog post..Ch-ch-ch-changes…
Jen M Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 1:14 pm
Today I vow to pick up a lock from Target while school shopping. High School is still a year away for my daughter - but right now she’s about to enter 8th grade at a Waldorf school which has a TOTAL of 223 children - pre-k through 8th.
I’m afraid she’ll get eaten alive next year.
I will be reading your blog more frequently for tips.
I am already worried that she won’t be able to open her locker/find her classroom/stay organized.
And I don’t want to be a helicopter parent.
Jen Ms last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Being Chosen from the Crowd to Train as a Jedi Knight = Nirvana for Six Year Old Boy
Rebecca Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 2:38 pm
Tonight you will go to bed satisfied.
Tomorrow you will wake. Ready to do it again because you know that is what makes you tick.
Wifey's House Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 3:03 pm
Today those kids are lucky to have you. Tomorrow you’ll want to expel them all. Smiles.
Wifey’s Houses last blog post..Erotica for Everyone?
Yolanda Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 3:51 pm
We often forget that our educators, our doctors, etc. are just human beings who felt a calling and have trained hard to do a job. Sometimes that’s done with grace, and sometimes it’s done carelessly, but it’s hard work done by another human being. It’s the human part we forget about, and get stuck on the title (teacher, lawyer, surgeon, principal).
Today, I feel lucky to have read someone write down their joy, their anxiety, their flaws, and their courage in a single post.
Yolandas last blog post..Arrythmic
Jerri Ann Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 7:50 pm
I remember the very first year that I taught. For the first few weeks I would collapse on my porch, not even able to drag myself inside. I would eventually build up enough stamina that I would make inside and all the way to bed. The first few Friday’s I would go to bed as as I walked in the door and would sleep til early afternoon.
Exhausted is not even strong enough of a word for the way I would feel! So, have fun, good luck and lastly, enjoy!
scoutj Said,
August 6, 2008 @ 8:24 pm
I used to run the 9th grade orientation and you actually just made me miss it a bit…..
scoutjs last blog post..So yeah…. I’m writing a book. Seriously.
mp Said,
August 7, 2008 @ 10:50 am
shit I hit the wrong button and my comment went away..it was an awesome comment too…
Oh well.. Make him watch Valley Girls.. I LOVE every song in that movie. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086525/
And what about I Eat Cannibals??
http://www.afn.org/~afn30091/songs/t/toto-i.htm
mps last blog post..I won a fuzzy bag!!
Tricia Said,
August 7, 2008 @ 2:17 pm
“Today I will love someone new and it will sneak up on me like it always does.”
Ohhh..I miss this.
Even now, as a stay at home mom, I seek out the trouble(d) kids on the school grounds. I hold them until they are ready to go in the classroom, I talk with them under the tree, I carry them to their teachers, I reprimand them on the playground, I read them a story and lend them nail polish, I love them from afar.
(I spend a lot of time hanging out at the school campus where six of my eight attend school)
Tricias last blog post..Sometimes you just need a little more protection
Linda Said,
August 7, 2008 @ 6:34 pm
Our students start back next week, and I will read this post the night before they arrive. Thanks for all you do. I know you have an incredibly difficult job. There is no more time consuming job than that of a high school administrator. My best to you for a wonderful school year!
Mocha Dad Said,
August 8, 2008 @ 11:15 am
Thanks for this post. Most of my family is in education so I can understand the passion and heartbreak that you must feel.
Mocha Dads last blog post..Million Father March