Comments on: If This Is You

By: dwatkins

dwatkins — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 09:03:38 +0000

I do understand what you are going through young sister. Yes there are nosey people in the church and yes they will come and try to get all in your buisness. I am learning to just tell people the truth and let them know that I will not discuss my personal or private buisness or my personal life with them. Yes , they get mad and say that I have an aditude and they always try to go to my husband and get information but he already know to keep his mouth shut tight. I am not at church to get in their buisness but to only worship and praise our our God and to get the word of God that will sustain my life. All you have to do is when someone tries to get in your buisness is to to tell them the straight truth. Y ou dont have to cuss them out or anything. They may get mad they may not but who cares, as long as they know where you stand. Eventually they will leave you alone. Keep teaching your son to keep people out of the buisness too. It will help him in the long run when he is older how to deal with people both professionally and at church.

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 13:14:12 +0000

Dear Sister Kelly…I am sorry to hear that you have been hurt. Reading your post reminded me of something so very important…Romans 3:23…For ALL have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God. This is why we NEED a savior (Jesus Christ). Even us Christians are going to fail, we are going to sin. God did not give us the ten commandments because He expected us to follow them perfectly. He knew we couldn’t. He gave us those commands because he wanted to remind us that we need a savior. To remind us that although He is perfect and without sin, we never can be, therefore we need to accept that Christ has paid the penalty for us. All this to say that although God wants us Christians to be a part of a fellowship of believers (if we are believers), it really is not about the “religion”. Religion will always fail us, because it involves the sinful hearts of man. Christ and the sacrifice that He made so that we may have eternal life with him….will never fail us. You have gone through a painful divorce, and your children are hurting….but Christ knows and He cares. And, believe it or not, there are many believers out there (myself included), who would love to help you in any way we could, or just be there to listen and pray. Although accepting Christ as our Savior does change our hearts, and our lives, it won’t keep us from ever sinning. This is why Christ died on the cross, to pay the penalty for our sin.
So, I just wanted to encourage you, that although this one church goer has hurt you, and she should have been more Christlike, this is not a statement about Christ, but a statement about the sinful state of man. I’d like to say that I, as a believer would never treat someone that way, and I can’t recall that I have. But, I likely have and didn’t even realize it!
Anyhow, I don’t want to take up too much of your time…I just wanted to say that I am sorry this happened to you, and that there are those of us out there who are true believers (not to say this woman was not, since I don’t know her), and who genuinely care about what you and your children have gone through!
In Christ,
Elizabeth

By: Tricia

Tricia — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 04:56:42 +0000

Sucks to be you, former prayer person!

By: Beth

Beth — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 02:25:29 +0000

You don’t know me….I’ve read you off and on for a few years now. This post really got to me.

Why oh WHY must “church people” behave in this manner? I’ve had sort of the same experience with people in my church..that I no longer attend. What gives someone the right to ask about “my walk with the Lord?” YOU DON”T EVEN KNOW ME!!!! It’s this kind of behavior that kept me OUT of church for years……

thanks for letting me vent a little. I’m sorry that your son had to have such an ass ruin his day……give him a big hug.

By: SHA

SHA — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 02:19:48 +0000

Bitch! Who does that to a child? I’m sorry.

By: scoutj

scoutj — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 18:32:34 +0000

WTF is wrong with people? Really. I wish we could sit and have a few drinks and I’d tell you about the friend of 10 years I just completely cut out of my life after finding out ….well I won’t say here. It’s seriously messed up what I’ve found out over the past few months. Like completely mind blowing.

ugh.

I hate people. Well, most people.

By: Mocha

Mocha — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:47:24 +0000

I’m trying to comment from my phone which bites the big one so I’ll keep it short.

Great comments. Really. I feel very supported by my friends and by everyone here. I just don’t want to lose sight of this: these are my reactions to being hurt, to living through divorce, and through the seasonal part of friendships, authentic or not.

And I’m healing. But I’m human. I get to react in anger. No, I don’t think she reads this blog. Yes, someone might point her here. Absolutely, you can say “fuck” here. It’s a really good, appropriate word at times.

Thanks for being a part of that healing.

By: White Hot Magik

White Hot Magik — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 22:58:11 +0000

Interesting debate that got started there. I am sorry your son went through that. I know I didn’t got to church for a long time because of people like that. Eventually I decided my spiritual growth was more important and found somewhere I can learn at. It is full of dirty nasty sinners just like me. This is a time when a sincere note, phone call to letting you know she cared would have been in order. Pray for her Kelly and really burn her butt….

By: Beth

Beth — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 17:40:08 +0000

I am not going to comment on the religious part of this story because that is between the pew partner and God. But I do want to say that divorce SUCKS! Noisy neighbors deciding they “know” what is best, ex-husbands deciding to discuss “unfairness”custody with a 5 YR OLD (sorry…that one is my ex.) Everything about it is just down right nasty. The worst part to me is that while we adults for the most part “get over it” The kids are the ones that suffer the most. They are pons in someone else’s game. I am sorry for your son and for you as well. I can only say that you will both be stronger for it in the end.

By: Caffeinated Librarian

Caffeinated Librarian — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 01:43:26 +0000

Grace, I agree – the point is not whether or not Kelly goes to church, that is HER choice. And a very personal one, one in which I would never try to influence her one way or another. And I don’t think anyone else her was trying to tell her she shouldn’t go to church, we were simply sharing that we had similar experiences and the consequences for us of those experiences.

The truth is that hypocritical people exist everywhere. But when people cloak their self-righteous selves in religion I find them MORE insulting and odious than their non-religious brothern. Part of that is because I take MY faith very seriously. And, as far as I’m concerned, whether or not I go to church has ZERO to do with my faith and my relationship with God. I’m sure He knows where to find me and I talk to Him fairly regularly in my prayers. As I evolve in my faith I may indeed decide to find a church that speaks to me and, who knows, I might actually find one. But I haven’t yet.

And so, coming back to your comment…how can I put this politely? How DARE you?! How dare you judge the people like me as “lame.” By what right do you make that assessment? I would no more tell you, a complete stranger, what you should do with your private religious life than I would fly but here you are feeling free and clear to tell me what I should do while knowing SQUAT about me or my life. How exactly do you justify that to yourself?