Over the last few months my blog has been “discovered” by the locals. And boy, are they restless. By that I mean that they mention reading my blog when I see them. Some are old friends, acquaintances, co-workers, and parents of my students. Ever since our local newspaper mentioned my writing there are some new readers here. WELCOME. I SEE YOU ON MY SITE METER. But this isn’t about the technology I use to see who reads me and where they are from in the world. That is, I suppose, the funny part to me. I have readers in New Zealand, Australia, England, and even the island of Hawaii (Hi, Kate!) who have been with me for years and watched the process of growing and changing and sometimes being a complete dolt who is hard-headed and can’t learn a lesson the first time it’s presented to me. For those faithful readers I am eternally humbled and grateful. You’re with me and I can’t quite express how much that means.
Since local folks have started reading me, however, I get some questions that I’ve never gotten before. “Don’t you get in trouble for writing a blog?” and “How are you able to write about your work in a public school without getting shut down?” and “How do you get away with that?” Even when a local reporter found me and started reading back through my archives (yeah, I saw you spend an entire weekend checking out my writing and I’m impressed because even I don’t go back and read stuff I’ve written for over 30 hours! But really! I’m honored!) he offered his opinion on my writing. I quote: “She’s also about as honest as one can get about one’s life and job without crossing the line and getting fired.” Sure, I know I’m “edgy” as a new, local reader just pointed out to me in an email. In fact, I’m having this pissing contest going on right now in the comment section of someone else’s blog on an issue and I’m certain the blog writer will ask me to stop commenting because I can’t hide the snark. The comebacks come too easily at times and that is, I have learned, very hard for some people to take. But again, I’m toeing the line and trying to be respectful of his space.
My students are reading me more frequently, too. They tell me this at school. Some of them wonder why I even like to write. Mostly, I respond to them that they hate writing right now in school because it’s required and getting feedback in the comment section is FAR BETTER THAN THE WRATH OF A TEACHER’S RED PEN. I’ll bet if they got responses to their thoughts the way a blog offers they’d be more likely to open up and find their voice. It took years to find mine. What I learned was that I like the short, choppy sentences. I enjoy leaving a one-sentence paragraph to complete a thought. And I realized that it’s actually OKAY to begin a sentence with the word “and”. It’s also true that I like to use the caps lock when I’m pushing a point heavily across the page.
What if I stopped writing about the anecdotes on my blog? Would you stop reading? I certainly don’t discuss too much of my personal life online that I can’t put out there for criticism. Does that mean I’ll never discuss my adopted daughter again? I know from hearing from people that it’s healing and refreshing to listen to someone honestly say, hey, this is my life and I’m learning lessons here and I’m screwing it up and making big mistakes but I’M LEARNING. I KEEP LEARNING. To my close friends I say that they know 100% of me and writing about your life and getting to the heart of the matter is sometimes not for public consumption. My guess is that I put about 10% of my life “out there” but that 90% of it is for me and my family and friends. You don’t get to comment on everything. That’s the beauty of this. Lots of blogging friends write far more personal stuff that, yes, I’m grateful for but, no, I wouldn’t share about myself unless it felt right and no one would get hurt in the process. That lesson? Already learned years ago.
If I stopped sharing about my work in education then you might never know an update to one of the stories I shared about a student that I called “Anna”. In February of this year I wrote about her here. Since that time I haven’t heard anything from her. I ask some of my other students and no one seems to know anything. I checked up on her at the alternative school she ended up attending, but her attendance didn’t last very long. The day before Thanksgiving, Anna showed up in my office. She stopped by on her way out to get a copy of her transcripts so that she could go back and finish her GED. She said, “It’s the best I can do right now.” and I accepted that. She hugged me and said she missed seeing me. We exchanged phone numbers and poof! She was gone again.
Should I stop writing about that? Those are the experiences that change me as an educator. I am ever a teacher. Most days, however, I am the student. Even you, sometimes, are the student and we learn together through writing. You’re with me and I don’t know if I could stop even if I were forced to do so. This writing? It won’t stop. Not even now that I’m at the end of the month of November and I signed up to do the NaBloPoMo deal of posting every day. No. I won’t stop.
I write to learn.
November 30, 2009 @ 9:17 pm | Filed under Brain Swamp, Inspiration, Lessons I'm Learning, NaBloPoMo | Permalink | Comments (14)
shoo Said,
November 30, 2009 @ 9:52 pm
This is what I wanted to ask you, “Now that the locals have you,” at the last tweetup, but beer and 25 geeks all in the same place got the best of me. My aunt even mentioned you at Thanksgiving. So have you talked to Kelly “Mocha Momma” W.? Those quotes are air quotes BTW.
It’s always weird when non-blogger type people start stalking your blog and start dropping things into conversation that you wrote about over a year ago. Yes, my dog is having proper BMs.
But then it’s also weird when people put two-two together and they connect your internet life with your real life. I never knew how much excitement it could bring to be known as the Springfield Blogger guy. Nor did my wife, when she was stopped in the park by another local blogger because the blogger recognized our dog Buddy. Totally weirded her out for a long time. This was way before the Twitter version of @mrsshoo, she’s warmed up to the local #217 internet community.
Keep writing, you’re a wonderful blogger / writer and an inspiration to the kids when not swearing like an Irishman. Keep up the good work!
Beth Said,
November 30, 2009 @ 10:10 pm
Thank you… for your writing and your honesty. Also, way to rock the hell out of some NaBloPoMo. Bravo you!
Mocha Momma Said,
November 30, 2009 @ 10:27 pm
shoo – I haven’t sworn on my blog in, like, FOREVER. (Because I’m actually trying to be a good example. It sucks.) Good thing to hear about Buddy. Tell him, “Way to poop!” from me, ok? I’ll tell you what else: when people recognize me or my kids. They are used to that and deal with it ok now, but at first they reacted just like Mrs. Shoo. Thanks for being the Springfield Blogger guy. It’s awesome knowing a local like you.
Beth – I’m so tired, but I also feel like I could keep going. We’ll see how that works out for me tomorrow night when it’s “time to post”.
Alana Said,
November 30, 2009 @ 11:08 pm
Holy mackerel! (I wanted to use an expletive there but I am following your excellent example.) Congratulations, Kelly! And this is an amazing final NaBloPoMo post.
katie Said,
November 30, 2009 @ 11:30 pm
just to say that allen has been in my heart since you wrote about him a few days ago. and – new zealand loves you X
Meg Evans Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 5:23 am
I think my brother is the only person in my family who reads my blog. I don’t really talk about it–and I had a “local” reader find me recently–she was at a birthday party that my son attended. It was a little weird, but a little exciting, too.
You keep on writing–I’ll be here with you. And I hope Anna can get her GED. I know teenagers think the world is against them and that nobody cares, but if Anna and all the others only knew that (and here I’ll be bold and speak for all of your readers) we are pulling for them and praying for them.
Karen Sugarpants Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 6:11 am
You are more than adored for your honesty, lady.
An aside: I was walking through my kid’s school yesterday, and a teacher & student were sitting at a table in the hall. The student was slouched down in her chair, arms crossed and said, “But I hate writing.”
The teacher responded with “I know you hate writing but you have to do it.”
I could have thought of 10 responses that might have sparked that child’s imagination – I hope the teacher did too. I instantly thought of you. WWMMD?
Mocha Momma Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 7:34 am
Alana, I’m so glad you kept reading even if you dropped out. You are, as ever, my favorite Haiku author.
Katie, I think I put your name too far at the end of that sentence up there. You’re my favorite Kiwi!
Meg, at least someone in your family reads you. This is good, right?
Karen! I see bumper stickers in my future!
You’re right. She could have given FAR better responses than that.
Brooke Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 7:47 am
What you said about your students asking about your blog reminded me – a creative writing class at a local school here actually has a blog up with the student’s writing. The students can post under their name or anonymously, and the teacher monitors the comments, obviously, but then they are able to write in a way that is comfortable for them, but also get the same kind of honest feedback that you get from your readers. I thought that was a cool idea – what I wouldn’t have given for the opportunity to LIKE writing when I was in high school.
Anyway – love your blog, your honesty…
Melanie Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 3:42 pm
Just read _PUSH_ today…wow. Anyway, your comment about feedback reminded me of Precious’ journal…an amazing model of learning by writing!
JenniferB Said,
December 1, 2009 @ 8:02 pm
I love your honesty, your eloquence. I seriously wish I knew you in person — I could use a kick-butt tough woman like you in my life, keeping me going!
I hope you know how much you motivate and inspire people!
Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommy Said,
December 2, 2009 @ 8:58 pm
Sometimes I wish I could blog in a vacuum. I’ve read the phrase, blog like no one is reading, but people are reading. It’s hard when the real world and blog world collide. You handle it very well. Your honesty is refreshing and appreciated.
MizFit Said,
December 6, 2009 @ 6:38 am
where have I been?! how am I only now discovering your blog?
off
to
explore.
Carla
Yvonne Said,
January 6, 2010 @ 7:20 pm
I just want to say
1) There is a whole family of Aussies who love you here. Even if we don’t comment often.
2) YOU cared when no one else did. You taught me the things I needed to understand to get my childrens educations straightened out.
3) The latest NAPLAN test for Bowen WAS.OFF.THE.CHARTS! Because YOU backed me, taught me the words to use, and believed in me enough that I fought HARDER to get what he needed.
http://www.naplan.edu.au/ for explanation of the test
For all that you are and all that you mean to me I can never repay what you have given me.
Sending lots of love your way. Yvonne xoxoxoxox