After spending a month writing a post (read: faking it at times with no more than a simple photo) every day I’ve come to the conclusion that I write differently now from when I began and it forces me to consider what’s changed during that time. Not only have I become lactose intolerant (thanks, Mr. Tummy, you’re kinda jerky for doing that to me) but I’ve become a single woman again, found and brought home another daughter, and learned important things about myself like knowing when I’m “alone” versus when I’m “lonely”. It’s also become apparent that I will forever have issues with my hair no matter how much of it I keep cutting. It took a while but I’ve also come to the conclusion that wearing a size Transvestite in shoes (thanks for the solidarity, my sister) is not necessarily a bad thing.
In any case, I’m taking writing more seriously and that’s why I haven’t updated on a more regular basis. And oh, the things I have to tell you! Like about how freaking tall my sons are getting and that I just look up at them in awe. (We’re closing in on 6′3 and it’s just kind of ridiculous that they were ever very small.) Or how I signed up to take kick-boxing lessons! Or even all the stories I have about my students and how the purse drive is going! You know, just basic daily happenings that no one is really interested in anyway. As is standard, I can’t talk much about the new writing project but I can say that I have an editor and do you know what goes on with having an editor? AP STYLEBOOK RULES and a whole bunch of very uninteresting guidelines by which I must follow. What happens when you start really paying attention to writing is that you read sentences like the previous one and ask yourself, “Did that make sense? by which I must follow? What the heck is wrong with me that I can’t write even a basic sentence anymore?” and then you second guess every thing and your confidence is shot and you think you’re a total dolt and that everyone from high school was right when they voted you Most Likely To Be A Beach Bum.
So, there’s a new freelance writing gig and there’s regular work and there’s my boring life but there are also new friends and old traditions and everything really is going well. I just thought it might be time to say, for myself, that I’m really happy and feeling healthy (oh, thanks to everyone’s comments about vegan foods and ways to change my eating habits and wow, that Kombucha stuff is amazing because I feel fantastic!) and that I’m in a good place. There wasn’t even a minor freak out when I was sending some writing to my editor and I wrote out the sentence, “Now that I’m nearing 40…” THAT RIGHT THERE IS QUITE A FEAT IF I DO SAY SO MYSELF. (My editor hasn’t been too subjected to my fondness for all caps. Lucky her.) Too often, I reflect when things are all wrong and when I experience bouts of WebMD-defined depression creep in and life is, generally speaking, crappy.
But life is good. Things are good. I am good.
That alone was worth mentioning.
So, how are you?
December 15, 2009 @ 8:34 pm | Filed under Can You Tell I've Been To My Therapist?, Does This Confession Make My Ass Look Fat? | Permalink | Comments (16)
Amanda Said,
December 15, 2009 @ 8:55 pm
You mean there are actual rules to writing?!
Like capitals and punctuation. (My current classroom battle, thanks for “letting” me get that off my chest.)
YEAH for an editor and can’t wait to hear more.
Laurie Said,
December 15, 2009 @ 9:18 pm
I am not that good. I was good in the summer but now I am not. Caught up in the dailiness of something or the other, I don’t know, and trying to move through it. But you know, I have a lot of friends and that makes things a lot better. I also have a job and I have some kind of stability so I can travel and eat and do the things I like to do. So really, things are okay. I should be bitch-slapped for complaining.
And thanks for asking. I’m very glad that things are good for you.
Kris P Said,
December 15, 2009 @ 9:55 pm
Thanks for the great post — very honest and natural!
However, as a little lady with a public relations degree, I gotta say — the AP Stylebook is far from uninteresting!
Lara Said,
December 15, 2009 @ 10:57 pm
I am TERRIBLE. Thank you for asking. I wish I had a happier response.
I’m glad you’re reflecting, though. I think reflection is always a good thing.
Linda Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 4:00 am
–laughed at size transvestite, I have thanked transvestites for years for making certain styles of shoes available to me (though I never wear them–crunchy ankle, bad knees) Have you ever seen the movie “Kinky Boots”? My six ft tall cousin only wears a size 7 shoe, I do not know how she stands up. Oh, and I do so enjoy your writing and am waiting to buy your book. I’m fine, enjoying life.
Meg Evans Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 6:09 am
What size is size Transvestite? ‘Cause I’m size Sasquatch over here. Maybe we should go shoe shopping!
I’m glad you’re well, I’m glad things are good for you. Things are good for us here, too. So it’s all good!
And my former English teacher mother would just die at all the non-sentences and dangling things I’ve just produced here.
Laura Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 7:31 am
I tell people I’m going to be a great bare foot waterskier because of my 9 1/2 AAAA feet.
Diva (in Demand) Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 10:01 am
Thanks for letting us read your reflections. I do that sometimes and end up wondering if I’m nuts when I look back at everything. LOL
emma Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 10:52 am
Kick boxing? Rock on! I’m so happy for you that things are going well. May 2010 bring you even more joy. And I’m looking forward to reading that freelance project when it’s done.
My 2009 has not been quite so stellar but one of the highlights was definitely getting to spend some time with you in person. Joyful.
Have a fantastic holidays. And Happy New Year! xo
Tweets that mention Mocha Momma » Reflecting -- Topsy.com Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 11:06 am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by mochamomma, brandabouttown. brandabouttown said: Time for reflection @mochamomma http://bit.ly/80AYlt [...]
Beth Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 11:57 am
I reflected last night with friends while at our bi-weekly Beer & Curriculum meeting. (We drink beer and talk about how we’re going to take over the world by changing the curriculum and the toads that teach it.)
Last week was a banner week: I passed the pediatric boards, I had an abstract accepted for a meeting in Chicago, and I got a job.
And as crazy as this week has been, I still love getting out of bed and going to work every day.
Yeah, life definitely doesn’t suck right now.
Sheri Bheri Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 4:47 pm
Things are getting better! I survived the weekend with my in-laws (outlaws!), survived what would have been my Dad’s 63rd birthday and now it’s straight on ’til Christmas. Oh yeah, and my Mom is taking the whole family (us & brother’s family) to Mexico after Christmas!
angie Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 8:10 pm
You read my mind about that sentence. I was like, “I know she didn’t just write that sentence!” But I feel you, and I don’t even have an editor. Just trying to write my own book that anyone would want to buy has stirred up such inadequacy that I have just. stopped.
Blogging is so much less demanding!
Anyhoo, your life sounds anything but boring, and how do you grow 6′3” sons? I wouldn’t mind that around here. I do have a daughter that just reached waif height, so there’s that. ..
Do your thing. We’ll be waiting to hear all about it when you can tell us.
White Hot Magik Said,
December 16, 2009 @ 10:40 pm
Love it! Glad to know you are doing well. I have wondered once or twice how you were doing. As for me, well, I have been in a bit of a crossroads kind of place. Still need to decide what road to take, but feeling confident again. So there that is it. I hope i get a good story to tell in any case.
Laura Said,
December 17, 2009 @ 12:09 pm
I love reading this and hearing that you are doing good. I love reading that I have a kindred spirit who can go through crap in life and come through it stronger and feeling like overall life is good.
Life in my corner is going better as well. We should share a bottle of wine to celebrate.
Sugar Jones Said,
December 22, 2009 @ 3:52 pm
I’m feeling good like that, too. Not super duper. Not crappy. Just really good. I think it’s the nearing-40 thing.
I’m catching up with you here outside of the Twitterz and I love following up on you and seeing what a strong woman says in the midst of life. Thanks for not leaving the blog. That would be bad.