Over the last two years our family has gotten used to going back and forth between parents. It’s a testament to the passing of time that I’m even able to admit such a difficult thing because I know it is not the ideal situation. More than anything I’ve learned that co-parenting sometimes results in an It is what it is sentiment because things are just beyond our control. I read with great interest how other people cope with the loss of a marriage through divorce, but I’m just not able to write about it. First of all, it would be one sided and that’s simply unfair. Secondly, I would have to permit entry into the hole that is left in my heart since my marriage failed. I failed. But it’s a mourning that others write about and explore far better than I could do justice.
Every week that my boys are with me they bring a few of their favorite clothes, a karate uniform, and a ton of DVDs. My sons are connoisseurs of films. Many years ago when they were quite young our family made the conscious decision to get rid of cable television because they were so impressionable and reality shows and sexual music videos began to get out of control in our society. Since it’s hard to monitor that we simply turned it off and started playing more board games, doing puzzles, and reading. After about four months when that wore off we visited our video store and rented all the movies in the Classics section because they were free. They watched Jimmy Stewart’s incredible performance in “Harvey” and learned nearly every line to Rosalind Russell’s “Auntie Mame” (my all time favorite movie ever) and then a friend let us borrow her Ealing Studios Collection of films starring Sir Alec Guinness.
We learned, watching the Ealing Studio movies, that the older kids didn’t get much into British comedy. I asked them what they didn’t like about it and Mallory responded with “Nothing EVER turns out right for those characters, mom!” True. It’s uh…kind of like the thing about British comedy. They were very meh about the whole thing and might even tell you that they suffered through it. The youngest loved it. He was probably 6 at the time so it surprised me that he liked it as much as he did. We got through “The Ladykillers” and were well into “The Lavender Hill Mob” when he spoke up and said, “I know that guy. That actor. But not like this. I know his voice.”
Morgan, my youngest, is really good with voices. And he was absolutely right. He did know that voice. It belonged to Obi Wan Kenobi and we’d watched enough Star Wars movies to choke a tauntaun.
Tonight, when my boys got here, Morgan pulled out 8 movies (EIGHT MOVIES LIKE WE HAVE TIME FOR ALL THAT CRAP) that he’d brought over and I grieved the realization that he probably wants to watch all of them before he goes to bed. “Look here, buddy. We aren’t watching everything. Make a choice and pick ONE.” One of them is the second “Die Hard” movie and since it’s been a long time since I’ve seen that one I had to ask if it’s the one in the airport and on the plane. Mason chimed in that he’s noticed a theme with the Bruce Willis movies.
“Ok, so the first one he saves everyone in a building. The second one he saves everyone in an area. The third one he saves a whole city. The fourth one he saves the whole United States. I’ll bet in the fifth one he’ll save the whole world. The sixth one he’ll save the universe. The seventh one he’ll probably save God.”
Mason sure does have a special way of summing things up. Speaking of summing things up, I don’t really have much in the way of tying this all together. But that’s how life is for me sharing kids. It’s really pretty messy. The point is, I have some great kids who are funny and who have managed to maintain a sense of humor. Even when it feels like nothing ever turns out right for us.
As an added bonus, I’ve included a very cute “sweded” version of “Die Hard” that I found just now. (Have you seen “Be Kind, Rewind”? Then you might know what sweded means. Great movie. Watch it. It’s super cute.)
Yippee-ki-yay. (I can’t write the last word of that popular phrase. I’m trying to be family friendly here. I don’t have to write it. You know it.)
Your Mason is pretty observant!
Love Die Hard, by the way. Clip is hilarious.
You seem a little sad. Hope not. Hugs.
Angie
GAWD, Angie. You can hear that? I thought I did a really good job of keeping my sadness hidden.
You’re awfully observant. I’m trying to hang on to the funny stuff. Maybe next time the entire post will be, “Can y’all just tell me some jokes, please?”
I don’t have any jokes, sorry.
What I want to know is, which die hard was it that the dude was on the toilet ready to explode, and who was the guy? For YEARS I’ve thought it was Charles Dutton, but I didn’t see it on his (very lengthy) IMDB page.
Frustrating.
Wait. Hold on. Auntie Mame is your favorite movie???
seriously? my sister and I watched that movie religiously on our friggin’ betamax growing up, like, almost every day. We never knew anyone else had ever even SEEN it.
Tug, that was Lethal Weapon and the actor was Danny Glover. But I can’t remember now if it was 1 or 2. Maybe 2?
Ali, we must sit down to watch this. Can you act it out with me and my daughter? We’ve seen it a lot. I am always surprised when other people mention that movie. But the Rosalind Russell one. NOT the Lucille Ball one.
Aha – see – you gave away your inner Star Wars geek at the mere mention of “Taun Taun” lol
I have loved Harvey since I was a kid. I even saw it onstage a couple times. This is the best line: “In this world, you must be oh so smart, or oh so pleasant. Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant.”
It was Lethal Weapon 2.
I was laughing and told hubby about the Die Hard quote. Then since we’re geeky we figured out the other movies in which Bruce Willis has saved the world(Armageddon) and the galaxy(The Fifth Element)
We couldn’t figure one for him saving God and yes in the two movies mentioned he’s not John Mcclane…or is he? *cue dramatic music*
Jonathan, I am unabashedly geek-loving.
Laura, that is just about the best quote. I really love it and had forgotten all about it. It must be time to watch it again.
Lee, OMG. He is forever SAVING everything and everyone, isn’t he? Hero complex? Is there such a thing?
I have a family friendly joke for you. It might elicit a giggle at least. Or I’ll get shot down in flames for offending someone… either way.
What do you call a Dwarf Fortune Teller who has escaped from prison?
(Drum Roll)
SHORT MEDIUM AT LARGE. (Boom Tish!!!)
You do sound sad. And need I remind you that you didn’t fail? Sometimes things just go wrong and cannot be fixed no matter how hard you try.
The kids are wonderful and they obviously LOVE YOU BOTH. WHICH IS A BIG ASSED VICTORY and NOT a FAILURE.
If you guys had failed as parents those kids you adore would have felt they had to choose sides.
Email me if you want me to send you naughtier jokes to make you snort coffee okay?
We love you xoxoxoxoxoxoxox
It makes me sad to hear about your divorce. You certainly sound like you’re going through it. I’m glad you and your boys have that connection. You made the right choice to get rid of cable and work on family relationships.
One of my mother’s favorite movies was Auntie Mame–Rosalind Russell’s version, of course. I know I have seen bits and pieces of it, but not the whole thing. I have been going back trying to watch her favorites lately, like Breakfast at Tiffany’s. It gives me a window into her soul. Sometimes those preferences are all you have left of a person, you know?
Just keep doing what you do. It won’t hurt so much in time.
Ha. I am married to a movie buff and have had my share of “film school” so I can appreciate that! And since you are a school administrator, I just HAVE to share that I LOVE Die Hard and as an English teacher, have used that movie many times to illustrate Freytag’s plot pyramid!