1. Everyone has been incredibly kind during my banking fiasco especially friends who send money to my PayPal without even asking or saying they were going to do so. That was a nice surprise because I’m not the kind of person who knows how to ask for help and these seven little words: “let me know if you need anything” seem to be more harmful than helpful to me. That, coupled with the online fighting and exposure of a big bank, has put me in a position to be safe right now. Details are not yet sorted out and I find myself on the phone with the bank every single day because the answer I get from one person doesn’t satisfy me so I’m doggedly persistent. It’s the only way to be when you’re playing hardball and the emotional toll infuriates me because why does it have to be that way? You people are simply phenomenal when it comes to ideas of getting my case to be heard and if I owe you an email it is coming. My inbox was simply inundated. Better yet, I am working on several freelance writing gigs which helps, too.
2. Family, I am learning, is what you make it. Where there is no family, you must make one. This has more to do with what I see in my oldest child than anyone because she has dealt with more paternal rejection than any kid ever needs to. After my separation and divorce even her paternal grandparents stopped calling her and nothing about that makes sense to me. For many years I have wanted to shout from the rooftops DO YOU KNOW HOW AMAZING MALLORY IS? Here’s the conclusion: whoever doesn’t know that doesn’t deserve her in their lives and I will happily take all of her. I’m thinking a lot about this idea of “family” right now. This year, for Thanksgiving, The Cuban and I will be with Mallory and her boyfriend and his mom and brother’s growing family. The invitation to that came at the right time and we are contributing pies and homemade breads and sweet potato casserole and dressing. (Honestly, I just make the best dressing I’ve ever had and no one else’s comes close.) There will be chubby babies to cuddle when we go over there. My only insistence was that Mallory come over Thursday morning in her pajamas so we could eat breakfast together on the couch and watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade where I will, once again, tell Mallory how much I wanted to be a Rockette. That never gets old.
Current family minus the horses.
3. Each year I am witness to something that comes naturally to a group of teachers and staff in my building and this year is no exception. It is inspiring to see people come together for our families to have a good Thanksgiving meal and our staff created baskets for families, picked up church-donated ones and delivered them, and invited others to a meal with our own. If you don’t think teachers are amazing people then you don’t know the ones I know. Living off a teacher salary is hard enough, but when you go out of your way to help someone less fortunate that makes you a hero/heroine in my book. Last night I dropped off two meals for families who otherwise wouldn’t have requested them and it’s humbling to walk into their homes and really see what people have to live with in their lives. The kids I saw showed no signs of weirdness at having their assistant principal walk into their homes. What would I have done if I experienced that as a kid? Teachers and administrators weren’t ‘real’ people to me back then.
4. When I write elsewhere I really like to provide a link or share it via social media. This is one that could have easily fit here as writing on my own blog: Pop Culture Parenting. There’s also one about cooking even though everyone knows I don’t do the cooking at home. Suffice to say that I can cook, but I just don’t anymore: We Eat Late, But We Like It That Way. Clicking on this one wins me a pony. Not really, but it helps if you go over and comment. But if I got a pony I would add her to my family portrait like the one above.
5. I have seen two videos this week that caused me either great pain or immense joy. The first, I will present without comment other than to say that everything I see on the news reminds me that this is all too common.
The second is the one that brought me immense joy. I have watched it 5 times this morning alone and each time I involuntarily smile at the thought.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
A great testament to what is really important.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.
Yes, yes and yes to #2. I also had plans on being a Rockette. In fact I’m probably the only person in history to disappoint their mother by not perusing a career in music. Instead, I became a scientist.
That last video is the best thing I’ve seen this morning.
The first time I saw the “Children See” commercial, I was actually amused. Not because I found it funny or anything, but because of the idea that some people need to be told their children learn by example. So while the commercial itself is sad, the far sadder thing to me is that it had to be made at all.
That being said, I hope it wakes people up who need to be awakened.
Oh my, that first video really got to me. I’m not a parent but I know kids are like sponges and watch and absorb EVERY LITTLE THING. That first video made me cry. I’ve seen the second one and I love it.
It makes me so incredibly angry to think of the way the bank is treating you. It is hard to believe that you are THEIR CUSTOMER. Whatever happened to reputation and service being important? No – they can act like the Mafia. Ugh.
I’m glad Mallory has found a real family. I know it still hurts to lose the ones that “should” be yours because of blood, but the story of shattered families is as old as human history and is the basis for much of our literature, music and art.
I hope you have a good holiday, despite these stupid bank struggles. I’m so proud of you and the other teachers for doing what you can to help your school families. Hugs.
I can’t believe your bank problems are still going on. That’s an absolute disgrace.
#3 reminded me that I needed to write a check for my company’s holiday charity initiative. We’ve chosen a family to help out and we’re also collecting gifts for kids at an inner-city school that we work with throughout the year.
Have a lovely Thanksgiving!
#1 Okay whilst I understand why those 7 words may make things difficult, but sometimes they are said as a way of letting you know we can help but don’t want to presume you want it. I take it for granted that you’re an independent individual and so would never want to step on your toes without doing stuff you’re okay with. I had confidence in you (noted you may not have felt the same at the time) that you would whoop those bloody bankers! Also I personally only ever say those words if I truly mean I am able to help. So Lady… if I offer you’re SO gonna have to ask… It’s my prerogative for being over here! Send me an email my lovely!
#4 I loved the Carlsberg Ad!
Family, paternal rejection, it’s all familiar to me. I hope she’s getting help, I’ve needed it. But she has you. I don’t have a great mom to stand on.
Anyway. Take care of yourself and your little ones. No one else will (well not true, but you get my meaning.)
That Biker video is brilliant – made me smile.
From your blog posts it’s obvious that you’re a very strong-minded, caring and generally amazing person. Best of luck with Stickin’ It To The Man, it sounds like you are getting there at least..
Enjoy your Thanksgiving.