This page needs a major overhaul and now is as good a time as any.
thanks to Katherine Corea Photography for this photograph
In my previous life I have been an English teacher, a Literacy Coach, and a person who could claim she was in “grad school” because I like the sound of that. Grad school eventually ended and now I claim that I am pre-doctoral even though I have yet to formally apply anywhere.
Before that, I worked as a Guidance Dean and I liked to claim that I worked in the Deanery. It both confused people and was entertaining.
My mom thinks I’m funny. I think that’s important to mention.
My dad doesn’t know I write online. I think it’s important to keep that from him. He’d crap a cow if he knew and lecture me about my fondness for profanity and about my oversharing. Recently, when I called him on the phone he answered, “What’s happening, Mocha Momma?” so I guess I blew that one.
My kids occasionally read me but I try to ask permission before publishing anything embarrassing or that would qualify as a felony in the great state of Illinois.
For some reason, people are fascinated that I was a teen mother and I’d be remiss if I didn’t say I wanted to slap my former high school guidance counselor with my rolled up diplomas and yell, “You asshat! Why did you try counseling me into cosmetology!” But I grew up just fine and I’d rather wait until I have a PhD to do that. There’s more class in it that way and I like to keep it classy.
NOW people are fascinated that the daughter I placed for adoption has resurfaced and returned to my life. We’re working on a blended family with her and the other three children and me. It’s quite the package deal of Uber Crazy but I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Currently, I am an Academic Assistant Principal and I have about 400 students in my charge and the job is ever changing right now because my position is unique to all the high schools in our district. That makes me either like a leper or a really cool princess with special superpowers. Sadly, I cannot come up with a funny phrase like “Deanery” yet. Feel free to jump in on that. Using bad words doesn’t help your efforts, either.
I have written product reviews and used to write daily about my coffee consumption and I have a fondness for the PR marketing folks who actually read my site and don’t ask me to try out their latest fat suit or suppositories. I’m not that kind of girl.
I’ve been on NPR’s “Tell Me More” show (which is hosted by Miehel Martin) twice. The first segment (Are Marketers Ruining the Blogosphere) can be found here. The second segment (Moms Tackling Germs) can be found here.
If you want to see some of my favorite posts, go to this entry and click away. Click, click, click.
I am also a Content Editor for BlogHer and all of my writing can be found here. I was a co-host for the vlog BackTalk with Erin from Queen of Spain, Chris from Notes from the Trenches, and Lindsay from Suburban Turmoil.
Since I enjoy fashion, beauty, and all things related to hair products BlogHer also lets me write for their Fashion & Beauty Hacks column.
Since my day job is as an educator, I like to occasionally write about the teaching profession.
Someday, I’m going to write a book proposal for my stories about Allen, my favorite janitor in the whole wide world. He became a mentor, a teacher, and a great friend to me. When I get off my ass, I’m really going to do it. I really hope that Someday comes soon.
There’s no such thing as too many sweets and there are a few people I’d like to steal a good caramel recipe from except I’d just eat it until my teeth fell out. I also like cheese and wine plates for an entire dinner some nights, a really good steak, and music that makes me either cry my eyes out or shake my ass off to – whichever mood strikes first.
Oh, and haiku are pretty awesome. I like to express myself using that particular form.
I’m newly lactose intolerant and drink this magical drink called Kombucha. If you want to buy me a case I’m down with that because it’s hella expensive and yet it’s keeping me really healthy.
Lip gloss makes the world go round, true, but it’s ok to pick up a newspaper and get down with some current events. Basically, don’t let my lip gloss fool you into talking down to me. That would be a mistake.
I find the funny in nearly everything.
We should hang out sometime.
