When the astronauts come back into the atmostphere there is all this bumping around and bouncing of molecular activity in the re-entry stage. It’s much the same when returning from a wickedly fun trip where I laughed too much (and loudly - some of you know what I’m talking about), licked too often (and laciviously - some of the pictures may be mistaken for porn), and stayed out too late (and lied about it - “I think I came in at 1:00 a.m., Becky. Umm… wait. Maybe it was 2:00.“)

Coming home to real life has that burning sensation to it where the people who know you well tell you to stop name-dropping and get back to being the momma of the house. It’s a little deflating and yet good for me at the same time.

My deflation happened early on at BlogHer where my friend, Becky, and I went to the bar as soon as we got there where I was met with this question:

Oh, hi! Are you here with Club Mom?

No.

Ohhhh…. (turning slowly away from me and letting the other women know that I am a leper and should NOT be touched.)

That’s ok, though. She more than made up for it when I heard someone beckon me to their table where she was sitting when this other person bellowed “Mocha!” That must have jogged her brain that she had, perhaps, heard of me from somewhere because she squealed, “Ohmygod, you’re Mocha? You’re MOCHA?” I’m too gracious to have shoved it back in her face so I smiled and hugged her and got leprosy goodness all over her shirt and held pleasant conversation with her and the other women there.

It made it a little better when Becky, who laughed with me over this first introduction in the bar, went back to where Club Mom was having their pre-conference soiree to drop off her empty wine glass at the bar said, “It’s ok. They’re all still in there and I dropped a really stinky fart and left it there just for you. Now, let’s go somewhere else.”

This? This is why she’s my best friend.

My photos are being held hostage in my camera and won’t be uploaded until I can get Jayne fixed (AGAIN. AGAIN! What a shit she’s being to me.) but I will flickrize them soon.

My favorite question and the one which I answered differently every time came in two forms. Either it was “Are you a mommyblogger?” or “What kind of blog do you write?”

It’s a personal blog, I guess. What I mean to say is that I puke on the page and people somehow respond to it.

There was no shortage of stimulating and intellectual conversation with the people I met. I don’t say “women” because I spoke with plenty of men as well. Discussions of what makes a community and how I identify myself as a person of color brought about many more complex issues which my brain is currently exploring. Having this conversation with Karen and Alice prompted me to confess that when I write about issues of race there are often a great deal of comments because this is a safe place. Sometimes, that confuses me because I wonder how many people have multicultural experiences in their own life and that there is a sense of burden on my part to represent my views in an honorable way. Then, I told them that I’m sure there are better places where people write more fluidly on the topic. Alice eloquently stated, “Oh. You’re their practice Black person.”

I’m still giggling about that.

Since I do so love to be in a crowd and have never met a stranger, hopping from group to group during social time was a veritable feast for me. Cliques and I don’t go together well and it’s my mission in life to break into each one, leave a piece of myself, and move on to learn about other people. That, to me, was the beauty of being in this space with these fantastic people.

I didn’t get caught up in the mommyblogger-vs.-everyone-else-drama because let’s face it: I have enough drama to deal with in my real life that I don’t need to take on virtual ones.

I tried pulling the shy people into the conversation as much as I could because I’m the complacent, quintessential middle child because, let’s face it: I want everyone to get along and have a great time.

I let my mouth take over and just spill things out that I can’t put back in because, let’s face it, it is fun to watch the reaction from other people.

To wit: When conversing with Heather about people not coming up to her the first day out of their own fear, I was comforted by her frankness.

Me: What? You mean they are afraid? Let me ask you this: Do you put your pants on one leg at a time?

Heather: Yeah.

Me: Do you take a shit, too?

Heather: Yeah. And it stinks!

Re-entry burn may not be so hard after all. I’ll just ask everyone about pooping today and it’ll be like I never left San Jose.

Belinda, from Ninja Poodles, is truly missed and I have made promises to keep her updated. There are far too many highlights so far and the conference hasn’t even begun! Becky and I traveled yesterday and spent the day in San Francisco at the Wharf doing various things.

• The in-flight movie was with Mos Def. How did they know I wanted to see him again?
• Are all pilots jocking to become comedians? Ours was testing out his funny material on us the flight.
• I was in California for all of an hour before I had some guy try to pick me up. He wants me to meet him a jazz club tonight. My husband would frown on that.
• It is true - I have licked someone already and no one had their cameras ready for it. HA. You gotta be quicker around me, girls.
• The paper with the hotel’s address on it is at home so we guessed about the whereabouts of the Hyatt. We parked and went up to the counter to see if this was the right place. Before I got to ask the concierge, I turned around and saw Heather Armstrong standing right behind me. Ummm… I’m pretty sure this is it.
• It is freaking me out a little when people say, “Oh, yeah! I know Mocha Momma!”
• People really are calling me “Mocha Momma.”
• Everyone is commenting on how tall I am. The internet makes me look really short, I guess.
• JenB and I spent some time getting to know each other last night. Belinda WILL get that picture I promised her.
• I brought too many shoes. I have guilt.
• Grace Davis is just amazing. I really do love her.
• Chase came to have coffee with me in my room this morning (SHE’S HERE RIGHT NOW) and is looking through my pictures.

I would be surprised if anyone who regularly reads this site doesn’t know the inimitable Belinda from Ninja Poodles. I’d be more surprised if anyone didn’t know what a Ninja Poodle is simply because, well DUH, and also because saying “Ninja Poodles!” is so darn fun to do.

My first experience with her happened in this hilarious thread. I’ve been in love with her ever since. Interviewing Belinda was a joy. We started with 72 emails and ended it with a very lovely, long phone call. Her accent? Is adorable. Don’t listen to what she has to say on the subject. Trust ME.

When did you start blogging and why?

I started reading Dooce when someone in my online “significant-others-of-people with bipolar-disorder” support group posted a link to one of her posts that dealt with her hospitalization for depression. Prior to that, I didn’t know “blogs” existed. it was from Heather’s blogroll that I first started reading other blogs, and I liked many of them. I have a distinct recollection of the two blogs that first turned on the “Hey, this is something I’d like to do myself!” lightbulb for me: Finslippy and Jen and Tonic. JenB, in particular, was a real inspiration for me in the beginning, and has remained a source of support ever since, and I now have the privelege of calling her my friend. For that alone, blogging rocks.

It felt good from the very beginning, too. Two of the first things I chronicled were from Alex (“Aluminum Underpants”) and Bella (“I Needa Make You Happy”), and thanks to them, I’ll never have a shortage of material.

Who do you read every day, rain or shine?

Dave Simmer’s Blogography

The Arkansas Times’ Arkansas Daily Blog

BlogHer

BusyMom

Paper Napkin

flickr

In my head right now is Mocha, arching an eyebrow as if to say, “Is there anything else you’d like to tell us?”

All right, FINE. Defamer. Happy now?

[*sidenote: the remainder of this interview was conducted with a box of tissues and a pout from the interviewer. Ok. Back to the interview.]

There are others which I would consider “MUST reads,” but they’re not people who post daily, so you couldn’t strictly call them DAILY reads. If those people posted daily, however, I would definitely read them daily.

But the sites I name above absolutely warrant a stop at least once a day, sometimes more. If I turn on a computer AT ALL, I will read Blogography — that’s how good it is. I know I’ll get a laugh, some hilariously creative tooning, and maybe even something to think about.

Actually, now that I really look at that list, I realize that what those three bloggers (Dave, Sheryl, and Busymom) all have in common is that they almost always make me feel good. You really can’t do better than that to assure return traffic.

Why did you choose to share that piece of yourself in the photograph?

Because you told me to over the phone, and frankly, I’m a little scared of you.

Plus, I would have worn those shoes and that skirt and that toenail polish at BlogHer, so I want you all to carry that image in your minds as you imagine that I’m actually there… and that you’re starting at my feet for some reason.

What don’t you write about? Anything considered a no-no in your book?

Nothing so far.

How do you feel about meeting bloggers in real life?

Oddly enough, now that it’s a pretty sure thing that I WON’T get to go after all, there is a small, odd feeling of relief mixed in with all the sadness and regret. Because now? None of you will know how fat I REALLY am, or how absolutely unlistenable is my hillbilly contralto speaking voice. AND, now I won’t be living with the crippling fear of saying something incredibly stupid and not being able to edit it out before publishing.

Also, I can relax about my husband deliberately embarrassing me, because for months he has been threatening to throw a conniption fit in the lobby, in front of the elevators, claiming to be “askeered of that there UPPITY-BOX.”

What is your favorite thing that you wrote or got a strong reaction from readers?

A couple of my favorites were “NEVERNEVERNEVER!!” and “The Great Pony-Getting Adventure“. Some that got a lot of response either in comments or emails were “Do You Know What It Means To Miss New Orleans?“, “We’re Thinking Of Instituting A Don’t Ask Don’t Tell Policy” and last month’s “Last Embrace.”

If you had a super power, what would it be?

Finally, something I don’t have to think about! There is no question, no hesitation, when I tell you that my super-power would be teleportation. Seriously, there’s not even anything else in the running, as far as I’m concerned. My ridiculous husband always chooses invisibility–pffft. With the power of teleportation, I would rule the world. Or at least always be able to cook anything I wanted at a moment’s notice.

Because, HELLO? Teleporting to the grocery store for fresh basil? Heck, forget the grocery store, the farmer’s market. Heck heck, forget the farmer’s market — ITALY! Oh, yeah. I’d be all over the whole teleportation thing. And in my version, anything/anyone I’m touching would totally teleport with me.

And then? Well, I wouldn’t even need the BlogHer conference, would I? Because I’d have already met you all in person by now! Truth be told, you’d all probably be all, “Geez, I hope that Belinda person from Arkansas doesn’t just POP in here again. Is she a pest or what? I wouldn’t even let her come over if she didn’t keep bringing that fresh Belgian chocolate…”

Belinda doesn’t need to bring me ponies, poodles, fresh basil or chocolate. I’d love her to teleport here right now. She can, however, bring that darling family of hers with her, because they. are. precious. I may have agreed to take our family vacations together next year during our phone call. She’s that persuasive.

Thanks for the interview, Belinda! You make a great subject.

Hop on over to Sarah and the Goon Squad to read her interview of me.

Tagged: Denise, Jenn, Marian, Liz Henry, Grace Davis, and Erica from Swirlspice

Even if you’re not tagged, please feel free to join.

Here are the directions (as clear as I can make them) if you’d like to participate in BlogMe 2006.

First, I’ll tell you about the inteviews. I came up with some questions that our little group edited and added to and we answered them all. We’re posting either some or all (it’s up to you) of the answers on different sites tomorrow.

I’m interviewing Belinda, Belinda’s interviewing Lisa, Lisa’s interviewing Karen, Karen’s interviewing Erin, Erin’s interviewing Fizzle, Fizzle’s interviewing Elizabeth, Elizabeth’s interviewing Sarah and Sarah’s interviewing me!

We just made a complete circle with the names. Need more explicit? Here, try this:

A interviews B
B interviews C
C interviews D
D interviews E
E interviews A

Everyone participating puts the BlogMe code on their sidebar, and it should link to the BlogHer website. You list the URL of the person you are interviewing, and the person interviewing you. And so on and so forth until we’re all completely bonkers.

Our theme (feel free to change it) is entitled “A Piece of Me” and we’re adding a picture of one piece of the person we’re interviewing. I realize some people like anonymity and this keeps that intact while offering a small glimpse of the person we’ve interviewed. Besides, pictures are always fun.

If you want to tag people, go ahead. If you want to put up your own interview and link back to me, go ahead. If you want to remove your liver with pinking shears at this point due to reading my perplexing directions, I totally understand.

The point is to interview someone you read and enjoy and introduce them to your other readers. We’re networking, people. Networking.

I wonder if this is any clearer now, but I’m not used to posting on the weekend. Any questions? I’ll try to answer them in the comments.

I thought it was pretty cool, too. But, I’m a Dork Supreme.

Read it here. 

Thanks, Lisa!