I’ve just not been able to write as openly over the last two years and for that I’m sad. Not that I haven’t written at all, because I have. But I haven’t been able to share it in an open forum like this here humble little blog. But you know how it is. You start to write some things and share some personal stuff and people respond and say things like, “Thank you for writing that and being honest and saying what I haven’t been able to say” or sometimes they say, “Well, that was a load of shite” because they’re all British and shite and spell shit with an extra “e” and then you wonder how it is that people in England are reading you and then you go, “Holy crackerjack, Batman! I’m the shite because of the foreign readers on my blog!” and then, of course, you stop that crazy thought because you know that shit is spelled without an extra “e”. Am I righte?

In any case, I have to say a thousand thanks to my readers. Because you have understood and silently encouraged and written lovely emails meant to cheer me up for dealing with a broken marriage and a newfound previously-placed-for-adoption daughter and two new promotions at work that made blogging super difficult and moving into a new house and losing my grandmother and still trying VERY hard to be positive and honest in this writing space. I’ve not always wanted this to be the journal that it’s slowly becoming but I’ve learned that I don’t want to be in that club of greedy bloggers and wannabes and drama queens.

All that was to say thank you for understanding when I can’t write it all down. When I have to keep personal things personal and not puke out feelings that I have to sort through here. Thank you for sticking around and making me still love this place. A place where I can’t do certain things. All the things I cannot say. All the words that won’t come out right and will be misunderstood or used against me. All the general bullshit about how hard my job is to write about except in a generic sense to protect the people I work with and the students I service and the families I come in contact with.

Really. I mean it. Thank you.

I have a thing. It’s a new thing. It’s such a great big thing that it deserves capitalization to be denoted as a New Thing. Part of me wants to make people guess but then I know I’d end up with things like:

You finally had that sex change operation?

The FBI relocation program has finally sold you out?

You’re going to seriously consider becoming a roadie with a magician?

Your parole is up.

None of those would be true. But I do have a new thing! It’s a really cool thing! It’s just that I can’t talk about it until Tuesday. In the meantime, did I forget anyone’s birthday? Did you ever find your wallet? I know you were looking for it. Oh, have you seen Slumdog Millionaire? Yowza with the awesomeness! (Somewhere my creative writing teacher is dying a thousand deaths. If you clap for her like you would for Tinkerbell maybe she’ll come back to life.) Would you consider purchasing these BitterSweets for your loved one this Valentine’s Day? What did you think of the Grammy Awards? Isn’t M.I.A. just a hot mess waiting to happen?

I can say something about this soon. It’s a really cool thing. Do you want to hit me yet? Don’t please. It’s terrible that I can’t even give you a useless clue. Oh! Remember the game Clue? Anyway, be patient. You’ll like it. It’s mmm minty.